Our party was up to six members, which is the average party size for the harder quests. We were truly a force to be reckoned with. Phoenix was just as helpful in combat as I thought she would be. She specialised in fire and lightning magic, but did have some other spells at her disposal… such as levitation… obviously.

  I was always perplexed by the hammer she wielded. Mages don’t normally use hammers. They use staves, sceptres, or wands. I asked her about it once. She said “The form of a mage’s weapon is irrelevant. They are symbolic to their users. This hammer is important to me, that gives me more strength than any staff ever could.” Which made a lot of sense to me. I guess, most people use staves or sceptres because they see others doing it and assume that’s how it is done.

  Agaroth was genuinely useful. Phoenix was right when she said we needed a healer for more difficult missions. He has saved our front liners from death several times due to his spells. He’s pretty handy to have as a fighter as well. He wields a flail and a short sword, which he uses in his off hand for parrying. Due to his size and weight, he can hit pretty hard with that flail. Clerics often use flails, but I have never heard another cleric being quite so aggressive with one.

  Phoenix seems to find him irritating and he makes me beyond uncomfortable. Even after over two years of adventuring together he still tried to talk me into using the whore house after every mission. He even offered to buy the prostitute some gloves so she could give me a “wee handy.” It is becoming more and more difficult for me to talk my way out of it now. Every excuse I give he finds a way around it, and when I still decline, he brings up Tilda. Which is even more uncomfortable than the whore conversations. He said “It is nae right, a boy your age, not even had a wee handy. Fuckin’ hell, no wonder ya donnae have the balls tae talk tae her!”

  It seems that to him I must be in a constant state of sexual frustration because I fancy somebody that I don’t have the courage to make a move on. What pisses me off the most about this is how right he is. I’ve liked Tilda for a long time. She is sweet and kind. The way she touches my arm when she talks to me. I wish so very much that I could feel her hand on my skin… instead of just this armour that I can never remove. I’m getting off track again… basically he’s helpful but very… blunt.

  Asmodeus however, was a pure blessing. He has basically taken over the role of leader of our party. He’s very good at gauging what missions we are able to do and under his instruction we have been working as a solid unit. We have been well coordinated and have been able to take on some pretty tricky missions. The six of us took on a drake… a fucking drake… I didn’t think we’d ever get to that point.

  The man was an absolute beast in that fight. The sheer force that he can stop with his shield after activating his reinforcement spell is astounding. Don’t get me wrong here… Chloe is an excellent frontline fighter and can do an obscene amount of damage with that great sword. And Tilda is fast as lightning and can dodge almost anything whilst inflicting lots of smaller blows that add up over time.

  Asmodeus however, he doesn’t even bother dodging. He deflects or just outright endures everything with his shield. He enhances his sword with holy light that allows it to cut through almost anything and he can even do damage from a distance with his lightning spear spell. The fact we came across him through pure coincidence makes me genuinely believe that maybe, the gods do actually favour me in some way. I still haven’t used my daggers, with him in the front I haven’t needed to worry about getting hit at all.

  We were just over two years into partying together when we got out first goblin extermination mission. This was six months ago; I was about fourteen and a half years old then. I cringed as soon as Asmodeus mentioned it.

  We were sat at the guild when Asmodeus told us that goblins had attacked a nearby village and it was “our duty as adventurers to exterminate this threat before anymore villages could fall prey to their heinous villainy.”

  I didn’t disagree. Goblins need exterminating. As I mentioned at the start of this story, they are evil and I want them dead… I really wish that they could all be wiped out so that nobody has to deal with them again. I would happily die to remove this scourge from the earth once and for all.

  That being said, I was pleased that we hadn’t had to deal with any of them so far. Seeing them brings memories to the forefront of my mind that I would rather forget. I would also have to be careful, as any other goblins would be able to tell immediately from my scent that I am no halfling. We would have to kill them swiftly so that they could not give me away.

  This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

  Asmodeus was explaining where the village was and highlighting the likely caves on a map when Agaroth burst through the door. Phoenix didn’t even look up at him and simply said “You’re late. Again.” Agaroth was never one to be punctual… or one to be fazed by somebody’s disapproval. He laughed it off and said “Ah, hush your lips sugar tits, I’ve got a surprise for ya!” “Call me that again and I will set your beard on fire.” Phoenix replied.

  Tilda looked at Agaroth and in such a soothing tone asked “What is this surprise?” Her voice truly does sound so angelic. Agaroth’s on the other hand sounds painfully rough. He continued laughing, gestured behind himself, stepped to one side, and said “I bring back-up my friends!”

  We looked behind him and saw something that none of us had ever seen before. It was a feline. I had read about them in books but had never seen one in person before. Their race is very isolationist. They reside on the other side of the Violet Forest and they do not take kindly to visitors. In fact, none of us had ever heard of them leaving their territory. So, seeing one was highly abnormal.

  This one had blonde furry cat-like ears poking out of the top of his head, a long blonde furry tail, and long blonde ringlets. The appearance was female… but goblins can smell the difference… underneath the smell of sweet apples was an undeniably male scent… granted, it was very faint but the scent was there.

  He wore a black leather battledress with a purple shawl and purple knee-high boots. He was very slender and not much taller than me, 5ft at best. I always expected a feline to have a furry face, but his was entirely smooth. His facial features were incredibly delicate. If I didn’t know from his scent, I would have sworn he was a girl.

  He had a quarterstaff strapped to his back and a fox-like creature resting around his shoulders. It was glowing as if it was on fire. He crossed his right foot in front of his left, placed his left hand on his heart, and bowed his head. He said “My name is Kiyui Kintari.” He gestured to the fox. “And this is Feiffer. It would be an honour to assist you on your upcoming quest.”

  The party was confused. We had not been looking for any additional members. Six was a good number for a party and we had not been having any problems that warranted having an extra person. Phoenix was the first to speak… “We do not need back-up, Agaroth. Splitting rewards between six is tiresome enough.”

  I could tell Tilda felt awful about this… she dived straight in after that and said to Kiyui “Not that we don’t think you’ll be useful. We’ve just been rather caught off guard.” Kiyui looked disheartened, Agaroth had clearly told him we could do with the help. Agaroth replied “Ack, he’ll earn his keep, trust me. Have I ever steered you wrong?”

  Chloe looked at Tilda and I and said in a questioning tone “He?” Phoenix responded to Agaroth’s statement with a simple one-word statement… “Frequently.”

  Asmodeus had looked deep in thought throughout this entire exchange. He picked up the map off the table and stood up. He made his way over to Kiyui and said “We do not have time to debate this. You may come along on this quest. If you are useful then you may stay.” Kiyui’s little eyes beamed with joy as he said “Thank you, I won’t let you down.”

  We had set off on the road to the south to investigate the village that had been attacked. We were hoping that would help us narrow down the nest location. It was such a small village that it didn’t even have an official name. The village itself was just on the other side of Lake Farren. It was a beautifully scenic walk. It was a sunny day in the height of May. The way the light reflected off the water, shining over the lilies and various other flora around the lake was breath taking. Tilda was walking at the front of the group with Kiyui and Asmodeus. Being the sweet soul that she is, she was desperately trying to make Kiyui feel comfortable and wanted. I was walking with Chloe, Agaroth and Phoenix.

  After a while Chloe asked “Where did you find this guy? He looks like he’d be snapped in half by the wind.” Agaroth laughed and said “He’s one of the perfumed poofs from the whoor house. He fancies himself an adventurer so a figured fuck it, give the lad a shot.”

  Phoenix looked decidedly unimpressed by this and said “You invited one of your whores because you thought… fuck it?” “Firstly…” Agaroth replied “… he’s not one a mine. I like ‘em big… particularly here.” He gestured to his chest as if miming having large breasts. “And second, he’s a nice wee kid; the fluffy thing can help attack and the lad knows some support spells.”

  It was at this point that I interjected “Umm… what’s a poof?” Agaroth responded with a series of words that I also didn’t understand “He’s a Jessie, a bender, a fairy, a fuckin’ fruit kid… he likes it up the lavender passageway.” Phoenix continued to look unimpressed, looked at Agaroth and just said “There is something very wrong with you.” She looked at me and said “He is a homosexual.” I still had no idea but fortunately Chloe clarified before I needed to ask again by saying “He fucks other boys.”

  I was taken aback by this. I simply gave off a stunned “Oh.” I was surprised that such things didn’t seem to faze any of them. Such activity is strictly banned within goblin nests. It cannot produce offspring and thus does not service the needs of the horde. Once you reach puberty the only sexual activity that is allowed is with a captured female. Any homosexual activity is met with castration and followed by death.

  It was at that moment that I was taken aback a second time and accidentally said out loud “Oh… so that explains…” before I cut myself off. Agaroth turned to me and said “explains what?” “Oh nothing…” I said “I just realised something about somebody that I used to know.”