“You know Amaranth, ma’am?” Tagg sounded surprised.

  “We met a while ago, at Leviathan.” Alexandria didn’t look away from me. “She helped me recover after he attempted to drown me. Do you remember?” I swallowed and nodded. “I’m glad to see you survived your encounter with the Nine and Echidna.”

  “Th-- thank you ma’am,” I replied. Why the fuck was she here?

  “Would you mind if I spoke with her alone for a moment, director?” she asked, finally looking at him. “There are some private matters I’d like to address. Just wait outside, I won’t take long.”

  “Very well ma’am,” he replied, rising and glancing at me before following his orders.

  “Now then,” Alexandria said after the director left, taking his seat. “You’ve had quite an eventful start to your career.” I grimaced.

  “I...guess so ma’am.” It was a hell of an understatement.

  “There’s no need to be modest,” she said. “You killed Shatterbird and arrested Skitter, not to mention rescuing Panacea from the Nine. Certainly more than most Wards in their first two months.”

  “Wish it hadn’t been...eventful,” I muttered.

  “Your career isn’t enviable,” Alexandria agreed. “Although you seem to have handled it better than most. I doubt many capes could joke about Leviathan on their second day.” I swallowed and suppressed a shiver.

  “Humour only on the gallows, ma’am,” I offered timidly.

  “Droll,” she said dryly. “Do you remember what you asked me?”

  My gaze fell to the floor as I tried to think back. I remembered talking to her before things started, figuring out my name or...using hers. Whichever. I knew I’d helped her up in the middle of the fight. Had I really said something? Alexandria seemed to think so, and I knew she had a hell of a better memory than me.

  She was Cauldron’s, I knew that too. I wouldn’t really care about that normally, they hadn’t hurt me and I didn’t want them to, but now she was here. An interesting career or not, I could think of only one reason Alexandria was coming to see me; and if she figured out the truth, I was dead and dead and dead again.

  “Sorry,” I replied, shaking my head. “I know we met, but that’s it. I...hope it wasn’t shitty?” Or terribly compromising.

  “I wouldn’t describe it that way,” Alexandria said. “But I would like to ask exactly what you meant when you asked if it was my first time being drowned. And when you said ‘it doesn’t get easier’.”

  Fuck. I’d said something that obvious to a god damn human supercomputer?! I could already hear my alarm blaring in my ear, not quite drowned out by the drumming of my heart. Alexandria was implacable, a stony tower of undeniable power like she wore on her chest. By comparison…

  “I don’t know,” I said with a shrug. “I say stupid shit all the time, ask anyone.” She stared at me silently for a moment.

  “Are you familiar with the PRT case files?” she asked out of nowhere, making me blink in confusion.

  “Uhh, sure,” I hedged. “Like Case 53s and stuff, right?”

  “Yes, Case 53 is one file, relating to mutations caused by triggers,” Alexandria said. I decided not to point out that vials were responsible, not triggers. “That is not the only one though, and more are being added with some frequency. Have you heard of case file seventy-eight?” I shook my head. “It’s a fascinating case; a patient who experienced a transfer of extradimensional memories that gave them a power akin to a strong precognitive. Does that sound more familiar?” I shivered as a bead of sweat trickled down my back, gripping my legs tight to keep my hands from shaking.

  Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

  “Please feel free to read the file,” Alexandria continued, dropping a small stack of papers on the desk before she rose. “I’ll return shortly. I hope this will...jog your memory, Amaranth.” Without another word she headed out, leaving me staring at the paper guillotine she’d put before me.

  My foot bounced against the ground in time with my galloping heart beat. Alexandria knew. Cauldron knew. My brain was buzzing with terror, too much to even consider what that entailed. I knew it would be bad because Cauldron was awful. If they knew about this, it was only a matter of time before they found out everything.

  I wanted nothing more than to scream until my throat bled, or maybe just blow my brains out and start the fuck over because god knew they would do that at every opportunity. I swiped at my eyes as tears began to crowd them, blurring my vision. My breath came in rapid bursts and it felt like I was on the verge of another heart attack.

  With trembling fingers, I grabbed the papers Alexandria had left behind and began to read the document that spelled my doom. It took a while to get through it all, between the panic and the tears, but I figured it out enough. It hadn’t been Cauldron that blew this up, it had been me...or at least my therapist.

  Yamada in her fucking infinite wisdom published this shit, at least internally for the PRT. I was the problem of course, having told her everything, but still what the fuck? Sure my name wasn’t on there but anyone with a superpowered brain, or even a half-functioning one, could connect which Ward joined in May and probably needed intense therapy.

  What was I going to do? What were they going to do? The PRT was still Cauldron’s realistically, even if they’d been outed they wouldn’t let it go that easily. Being a Ward wouldn’t save me. I wasn’t sure anything could though. Even if I just outright walked away right now, just left the building and tried to disappear, they’d just send their fedora wearing boogeyman to kidnap or kill me.

  The papers fell from my trembling hands and I covered my face, trying to control my breathing, to think instead of just panicking. It wasn’t easy because all that I could think of was how well everything had been going, how I’d been doing things right for a change. The Wards were my friends, Amy was my friend, and god dammit I didn’t want to lose them. But I would, because Alexandria was here for me, and Cauldron--

  Was she here for me?

  The thought cut through the thick fog of terror like an icebreaker through the Arctic. I bit my lip as I considered it carefully. She was probably here for me but...had she come here in the story? I tried to think of it, and think nothing of the person who knew the answer. It wasn’t easy, but I had to know if I was safe or if I was screwed.

  No, she had come here for Taylor in the story. Except Taylor turned herself in, and this time she’d been arrested. Was Alexandria here for the same reason? And what the fuck was her reason anyway? Had to be making some kind of deal between Cauldron and the Undersiders. They had that portal to another world, and Cauldron no doubt wanted a slice.

  Except it went wrong, badly wrong. I didn’t know details, but I knew only Skitter walked out of that room alive. She found a way around Alexandria’s invincibility and killed both her and the director. My stomach churned at the realization and I found my heart racing yet again. Things were different this time, there was no guarantee that Skitter would kill them now. But I knew, and I had to do something about it. I rose from my seat and strode to the door, then paused as my hand touched the cool metal of the knob.

  I had to go out there, had to warn Alexandria and Tagg to back down before it was too late. Lives were at stake, blood that would be on my hands if they died. I could stop it though, like I’d stopped Amy, like I’d stopped Skitter. Sure it meant outing myself fully to Cauldron, probably getting black bagged too, but what other choice did I have?

  I let the handle go, turned back to the office, and took my seat again. My stomach was churning so badly I grabbed the trash bin and put it near my feet, just in case. I felt fresh tears wetting my mask as they fell and shut my eyes, trying to stop the sobs before they could escape my throat. There was a quiet whine in my ears, and I couldn’t tell if it was just me or--

  “Amaranth.”

  I started badly enough that I toppled from the chair to the floor, a yelp escaping my lips as I bruised my shoulder. Scrambling to my feet, I blinked away the blurriness of tears and scanned the empty room. Empty...no, not exactly. There was a small, black cloud hovering around head height where I’d been sitting. Skitter.

  “Amaranth,” the bugs hummed again quietly as I took my seat. “Help.” Help my ass. I was the one who needed fucking help. “Alexandria is going to kill the Undersiders.”

  My eyes widened. Was that true? The thing that made Taylor freak out in the story had been...what? A body bag, right? I knit my fingers together and squeezed them til it hurt.

  “Help, or I’ll stop her.”

  I couldn’t help them, couldn’t help Alexandria, couldn’t help Taylor, because it would mean the death of me. Maybe not immediately but eventually. I would lose everything. I’d lose everyone. I hated that I had to choose between reliving my pain over, and over, and over, or losing whatever part of me left that wanted to do good. I hated how easy the choice was, in the end.

  I ducked my head and covered my ears, ignoring Taylor’s pleas for help, ignoring the buzzing of her swarm grown louder, angrier. Most of all, I ignored my tears; at least, as best I could.