Chapter 1: I Am a Rubber Duck!
Today, like most days, I simply floated.
Bobbing up and down, I drifted along the waves of vile, disgusting sludge that filled the sewer pipelines. Unable to move, I remained but a helpless victim of the tides — a mere passenger — forever trapped inside the shell of a small, yellow rubber duck.
To understand my pitiable predicament and current rubbery duckness, I’d have to take you back to the day it all started, when Truck-kun magically appeared and ran me over.
Yes, the Truck-kun from that ONE anime.
Now, you might be thinking: ‘Wow! What a silly premise!’ or ‘How cliché! There’s no way anime’s #1 serial killer found you!’
Alas, I kid you not. Truck-kun exists as a vengeful spirit, and it takes no prisoners.
I remember that day fondly, despite my inevitable demise, as it was one of my last moments of autonomy and, in turn, a precious memory of a life before this one of perpetual buoyancy. It was dark and raining, and I had just picked up a cup of large fries from WacDonalds — a little salty goodness to celebrate my new job as an office worker, away from the stress of my army career.
Then, it happened.
Straight out of an alley.
I never stood a chance.
Once again, my imaginary friend, you might have more questions: ‘How do you know Truck-kun doesn’t take any prisoners?’ and ‘Why did it target you?’ Well, I'm glad you asked!
Simply put, I DON’T KNOW! As driven as it was to mow me down, it was never clear why I was its ‘chosen one.’
And I’m familiar with its relentlessness, as I astonishingly didn't die from the initial impact!
As a kid, I ran track, practiced martial arts, worked out, and spent my days cleaning houses to pay for college. So, I was fit and had a strong constitution. Or... at least I think I did. Maybe I'm confusing myself with the kid next door?
Anyway, when Truck-kun’s headlights flooded the narrow alleyway and marked me on its war path, I instinctively tried to dodge. My futile attempt to save myself, however, only prolonged my suffering as my body slammed into its radiator, flying over the truck’s dark hood instead of beneath it.
Hitting the ground with an ‘oof,’ I started to crawl., Though my aching limbs screamed at me with each agonizing drag of my crippled form across the pavement, my mind was firmly tethered to the squelch of potato mush beneath me — my reward, my comfort. In spite of everything, I found myself helplessly lamenting the loss of my salted French fries, even as I desperately tried to get to safety.
Funny, I was on death's door, yet all I could think about were thosewas my spilled fries.
It was then that Truck-kun came back into view. Its headlights sliced through the pouring rain, illuminating my broken body beneath a night sky swirling with thick, oppressive clouds, with the moon completely hidden from view. There was a palpable ferocity in those fluorescent beams, flickering with a blinding fury from the fact that it had failed to one-hit KO me. I could feel it: an all-consuming rage that its perfect streak had been broken.
It honked, revving its engine as I lifted a broken arm in futile defense and pleaded for it to spare me. Yet, my pleas fell upon deaf, metallic rearview mirrors.
It sped over me, mercilessly crushing me under its weight.
But it didn't end there. I survived. By some cruel miracle, I was still alive.
So, Truck-kun put it in reverse and backed over me, driving my mangled fleshcrippled form further into the pavement. Again. And again, until I was nothing but a fine, bloody paste on the weathered cement.
YSo, yeah.
That's how I originally died. I had read stories about things like this, watched shows, and hell, I'd even heard rumors of Truck-kun appearing with monsters, emerging from portals in Mexico, the US, and Japan, and people gaining systems. But it was all quickly dismissed as mere hoaxes.
Fast forward a bit, and I met a red-haired man who claimed to be a god, all while petting his adorable white cat. He apologized about his Apostle's behavior before telling me that I'd been summoned for a grand purpose: to defeat the Demon Emperor and save a world on the brink of disaster.
You know, generic isekai stuff.
I recruited and led my party of heroes, gathered skills, fell in love, and, in the end, had my grand stand-off with fought the Demon Emperor, just as it had been ordained.
A heroic tale as old as time, right?
Except, in this story, I didn't win.
I lost against the Demon Emperor. The bad guys won, my party disbanded, and my skills were sealed away. To add insult to injury, my soul was condemned inside that of a rubber duck, intended as a gift for the emperor’s daughter.
The very daughter who, in a stroke of unfortunate luck, accidentally flushed me down the toilet.
And…that's pretty much my entire life story. Oh, and did I mention it has been, like, a hundred years since then? A hundred years of isolation — just me, the sludgy water, and the slimes.
At least, I think it's been a hundred years? It’s kind of hard to tell when you're a rubber duck, particularly one without access to a smartphone, a watch, or even, a sundial.
Or…sunlight for that matter.
Or ears.
Or eyes…
That's right. I can't see! But, I can squeak. Taking in air through my mouth, I can expand and compress my body, forcing air through a squeaker in my beak. After a hundred or so years of experimenting, I eventually developed a nifty echolocation ability.
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That's it — the ins and outs of my woeful condition. I float and I squeak, existing aimlessly through the putrid sewers that I resignedly call home.
Speaking of home, the underground waste network was built in a strange circular pattern that seemed to stretch on forever. Or, so I thought. Every now and then, I'd experience a sudden drop, as if I were falling, but upon using my Squeaker-Location (an apt name, I know), I discovered I was simply being teleported. There was some kind of magical effect that bound me in place, tethering me back to the middle of the sewer, where I'd land with a splash and continue my never-ending voyage.
Up and down, up and down.
Forever.
And ever…
And ever…
An endless cycle of drifting.
Please, help me.
[Experience has reached MAXIMUM level!]
[Core Accumulated!]
Huh?
[Standby for Integration...]
What…?
[Integrating…]
What’s going on?
[Integrating…]
What the hell is this?
A spark. Something stirred within me, like a rumbling in the void at the hollowed center of my squishy prison.
[Core Connected!]
Who is this? Who are you?!
[Dungeon System… Activating!]
Wait, what the fu-
[Dungeon Core: Active!]
Suddenly, for the first time in ages, I felt something.
It felt like a surge of energy, like electricity, or an explosion of power that kick-started my long-since dulled senses. I could feel the boiling water under me, the warm caress of steam, and the smell…
Oh. Oh, God.
Oh, God! OhGodohGodohGod!
My squeaks echoed throughout the sewer channels as I convulsed and gagged on the inside. I attempted to will my body to twist, to shrink in on itself, or to cut off my ability to smell altogether, to no avail. The hysteria only worsened my situation, forcing my body to involuntarily gulp volumes of the foul odor.
I was unprepared. The rancid stench of my home overwhelmed my reclaimed senses.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! KILL ME! PLEASE!
[What is your name?]
Words, once again, began forming in my mind — a welcome distraction, to which I could only respond with a single, What?
[Confirm Name: What?]
[Y/N?]
What? No!
[What is your name?]
Name, name, name! I had a name once, but what was it? I racked my nonexistent brain, thinking, sorting, and sifting, trying to uncover the traces of my past. I struggled to maintain my sanity amid the sudden bombardment of stimulisensations and the glaring white textletters forced into my mind.
My name….
It started with an ‘H,’ this I knew, but I couldn’t remember. It was like there was a fog blanketing my inner thoughts. I could envision glimpses of people as they spoke to me, addressed me, called out to me, and cheered for me, but for the life of me, I just couldn’t remember. So, I went with the two things I knew about myself.
One, I was a rubber duck.
And two, I was a hero.
[Confirm Name: Hiro]
[Y/N?]
Yes.
[Processing…]
I focused long and hard on those words, placing them at the forefront of my mind to prevent my psyche from collapsing in the midst of the wretched smell that permeated the space around me. It was disgusting, and what I had thought was water from a septic conduit in the sewer turned out to be bubbling, toxic sludge.
Disgusting! Disgusting! I tried to focus on the words engraved in my mind's eye, yet the smell triumphed over all!
Clean! Clean! LET ME CLEAN! I raged.
It was the first emotion I'd ever felt in hundreds of years, and it was the desire to purge the filth from this world.
[Dungeon Registered: Hiro’s Dungeon!]
[Dungeon Core Skills Unlocked!]
[Congratulations! Please see your SYSTEM HANDBOOK for instructions on how to run your dungeon! Good luck killing heroes!]
The mysterious words left as quickly as they had come, leaving me alone once again. But now, I was angry and confused, driven by an overwhelming compulsion to OXYCLEAN the world of its stains.
[Rolling... Starter Skills]
The system was back, but this time, it was different. Less intense and more focused, its interface was easier and more comfortable to perceive within my thoughts. I felt a tug, as if my very being was being shifted, until suddenly it stopped, leaving me with a plethora of messages in the void that was my inner consciousness.
[Water Affinity Detected!]
[Obtained: Squirt Water LvL.01]
[Obtained: Bubble Blow LvL.01]
[Obtained: Acid Immunity LvL.??]
[Obtained: Striking Resistance LvL.06]
[Obtained: Slashing Resistance LvL.06]
[Unique Skill Detected!]
[Integrating… Squeaker-Location]
[Obtained: Squeaker-Location LvL.02]
[Soul-Bound Skills Detected!]
[ERROR! 404! Skill Page Not Found]
[Troubleshooting…]
[Soul-Bound Skills Sealed!]
[Attempting Seal Break… 1 of 146]
Suddenly, a weighty pressure wrapped around my sense of self, like a complete and utter vice around my soul.
Pain.
For a lack of a better word, that’s what I felt. Having been numb for so long, I relished it — madness in my soul, as something I thought I'd never miss sprang forth: happiness, of a degree I never knew I could achieve!
I squeaked in jubilation, instantly regretting it as the sewer’s gaseous toxins assaulted my innards once more. My lamentation, however, didn't last long, as the next message I received froze me to my rubbercore.
[Seal Break: Successful!]
[Soul-Bound Skills Unsealed!]
Immediately I could feel another change occurring inside, a cataclysmic adjustment in my core.
[Reclaiming… Soul-Bound Skills]
Was this it? Was I going to reclaim my heroic stature, my skills, and my position as the strongest hero? Even as a rubber duck, just having a fraction of my old skills would be a start! I greedily waited, anticipating that with this power, I might one day regain even a semblance of my former glory.
[Skills Reclaimed:2]
Eh?
[Obtained: Summon Rock LvL.01]
[Obtained: Impart Instruction LvL.01]
[Curse Feedback Detected!]
[Permanently sealing soul-bound skills to protect the user from curse feedback!]
What?!
[Sealing Skills...]
NO! NO! NO!
It wasn't fair! I could see them — my skills — foreign yet familiar and grayed out on a list that was rapidly disappearing!
Please! No! No! NOOOOOOOOOOO!
Squeaks of agony bled from my permanently gaped beak. This was it; my hopes and dreams were eviscerated within a matter of seconds. Memories I had once thought lost had just begun to resurface — memories of all my time, effort, and tears I had shed in pursuit of power.
And just like that, it was all gone. Once again, it was locked away, and there was nothing I could do to stop it as the skill list vanished. The tragic reality hit me as harshly as Truck-kun had stolen me from my peaceful one.
I was a rubber duck, and my time as a hero was truly over.
