Chapter 21. Crimson Haze

  We began walking back to the Control Room, Emily glued to my side. Given that it was a bit of a walk back, I started up a conversation with her.

  "I'm not sure what to talk about, but uh, how have you been?"

  "Where to start...the last week has felt more like a month; we've been super busy. But it's been good, hard, but good."

  "Well...that's good at least," I muttered to myself, a gnawing feeling of something important I was missing eating away at me." "Listen... I uh, I'm not sure how much of a help I can be. And it's not that I don't want to..it's just..." I sighed.

  "It's alright, you can speak your mind with me," Emily comforted, guiding me further from the rest of the group.

  "Well, it's just, with my amnesia, or memory loss, and being unable to consciously control my powers without blacking out. I think I'm too unstable to be a part of the team, I feel so out of place like all of this is just some strange dream." I rambled, finally expressing the thoughts that had been filling his head. "In the shelter, and even now, I can feel that I'm subconsciously suppressing all of it, and that with enough of a conscious effort I could release it. I'm not like all of you, I can't control it, the next time I snap, I can't promise that I won't hurt someone, or you. I probably already have, and I can't with a good conscience willingly risk it."

  Emily wiped away a tear rolling down my cheek and attempted to calm me down. "It's going to be alright Xavier, just breathe. Losing control now isn't going to help, so just stay in the present, where you do have control. Remember what I told you before, and know we're in this together. Take it one moment at a time, the future is just that, the future. You're in good hands, and I promise you, the Commander, and everyone else here, will do everything in their power to help. They have methods to help that are way beyond my understanding, so don't be discouraged, there is a way." Emily finished, a reassuring yet melancholy expression on her face. "Also, I know I've apologized before, but I'm sorry for kidnapping you. And for being so cold and aggressive about it, after more time reflecting and growing as a person I see how harmful it may have been for you. Not to excuse myself but at the time I was more on edge than I had been in years, and with your presence in the shelter it only made it worse. And I took it out on you, so I'm truly sorry.

  I took her advice and just breathed, focusing on my surroundings and body forcing myself to be in the moment. Her words had helped more than I thought they could, like it was exactly what I needed to hear. Taking a deep slow breath in, and then out, I took a simple glance to my left, a wall 5 meters away. It was a sleek dark purple and had a simple brick design. lighting fixtures were placed 10 meters equidistant from each other, and lit the large corridor well. The floor was made of the same odd material and didn't seem to have any wear and tear besides the remnants of tire marks. I hadn't really noticed any of this before, my attention inside my head and on the Commander. I continued to take deep breaths in and out and kept focused on the moment.

  I then took a few seconds to process her apology. "It's alright Emily, I understand, but I appreciate the apology nonetheless."

  "At least pretend to be a little upset at me, I know I would be." She teased.

  Laughing, a smile appeared on my face and I had well and truly begun to feel better.

  Taking my attention off of Emily I glanced at the team, watching their movements and observed more closely to how they chatted with each other. Braden and Raven seemed to be close, their body language open and relaxed. Sam rambled to Grey, Sam's outward appearance being positive but I could tell they were guarded. Grey just nodded, not seeming to reply, simply listening to the overzealous and chatty Sam.

  I could feel a qualitative difference in my mental state, the anxiety and worry I was previously overwhelmed by seemimg silly. I was Oblivion knows how far underground and surrounded by those only wishing to help. The atmosphere was foreign but comforting in a way. I walked next to Emily, away from the rest in a comfortable silence, other than the loud footfalls from the Commander. The man gave off a very strange vibe, his gate was confident, almost superior. Although he walked effortlessly, it seemed like a great power was held within him, weighing him down. Even so, the goofy smile always plastered on his face made him seem unserious, which somehow made him more intimidating.

  We finally reached the main hallway, the seven of us now barely fitting shoulder to shoulder. Which was still pretty wide for a hallway.

  I looked over to Emily and smiled at her. "I'm feeling better Emily, thank you."

  Without hesitation, she quickly brought me into a hug. "I'm glad, and as an extra bit of consolation, the very fact you aren't enraged at this very moment and were even able to quell your negative emotions, is proof you are strong. From what I know, most people can't fight it at all, and even then, those who can still struggle heavily with any negative emotion. The pull they feel to give in is too strong. So even if it is difficult, I believe you have the inner strength to overcome the negative influence." She explained, her voice smooth and calming. I gave her a sincere nod, and we caught up with the group, continuing to walk along behind them.

  "Well, it seems you've really opened up, it's kind of jarring. Of the short time I've known you, a majority of it you were closed off or confrontational. In the last few days I did notice you opening up more, but you've not only given me a heartfelt apology, but given me two hugs in such a short amount of time. I wasn't even sure you were capable of such a thing." I joked, jabbing her in the side with my elbow.

  She smiled but then looked off to the side, her expression distant. "I know that you don't remember much, and I don't want to trigger some PTSD response or anything. But I almost died, and you saved me. Along with many of the residents of the shelter. I was sure I was going to die, you as well, but you beat the threat. I guess what I'm trying to say is something like that changes someone. I've been injured badly before, sure, but this was very different. So I apologize if I'm a bit reverent towards you, but not many have cared as much as you have."

  I sniffled and tears fell, some glimpses of memory coming to me. They weren't as overwhelming as I feared, the imagery feeling detached like I was experiencing what happened to someone else. "I remember a bit... enough to have some context...but just random moments. Is...is Dennis..?" I feared to ask, unable to fully ask what was on my mind.

  Emily shook her head and gave me an apologetic but comforting look.

  "I see," I said, sniffling.

  Emily put her hand on my back and rubbed it consolingly, which helped calm me down. I continued focusing on my breathing and looking ahead as we approached the Control Room.

  As we entered the room, Jordan stood where we had left him with the addition of John now sitting in one of the chairs, his face serious.

  "Alright, everyone sit!" The Commander, well, commanded. He stood at the front of the table, the monitors behind him. Taking out a small device, he peered down at it for a moment before speaking. "Alright, here's how this will go down. First order of business we'll do a short debriefing on the most recent expedition. After that we'll do the ol' explainer for Xavier, and lastly a little surprise for everyone at the end." Commander Caeruleus stated, matter of factly.

  He looked around the table with his bold smile on full display. Everyone glanced around at each other, murmuring about the man's statement. I simply sat waiting for the party to start.

  "Expedition number 22, fourth debrief, anything of intrigue to report from the team?" The Commander asked, giving the team the floor.

  Emily spoke up, her voice carrying authority and confidence I had yet to hear. "From our routine sweep of Reunity, the conclusion is apparent. There are significantly fewer individuals than groups. The scanners may be able to show that to an extent, but the full picture is grander."

  "Hm, as we feared. The groups are either absorbing anomalies or eliminating them. The latter could be considered a good thing as an unpredictable heavy hitter is eliminated. But this also means the group grows stronger and were able to take on the individual and come out victorious." The commander replied.

  John chimed in on the discussion, voicing his concerns to Emily and the group. "Have you gotten a feel for how powerful these groups are? There's only so much we can tell from here and I haven't gotten close enough on my solo recon and rescue missions."

  "It would be a huge risk. These groups most likely rival the Muscled Maniac in threat, if not supersede it. If it were a good matchup we could potentially edge out a victory but as things are now, we are outclassed." Emily responded, confirming the Commander and John's concern.

  "Anything else?" Commander Caeruleus asked.

  "No. nothing of note at least."

  "Alright, Jordan, anything on your end?"

  "Uh, right, there might be something. I've been looking at the data of the groups' movements, and putting them through some algorithms." He started, bringing up his findings onto the table, the whole surface turning into a screen. "At first I hadn't noticed any real pattern or significance to their movements but that's when I realized. There is still an insufficient amount of plot points to be 100% certain but it appears that their movements aren't truly random. For groups that are supposedly separate and with no affiliation with each other, there is a suspicious lack of overlap. Now, the conclusion I first came to when this became more and more apparent was that they were intentionally avoiding each other. And while this is certainly an easy thing to assume, it's strange that there have been no groups attacking each other. Not only this but, just look." Jordan explained, proceeding to play a time-lapse of groups of red dots over time.

  It showed a part of the city and a few groups seemingly searching for something. The groups would never get too close to each other and after a time the groups would all start going in the same direction. It almost seemed like they were searching for these anomalous and powerful individuals and then being called back somewhere.

  "Now, this is either a huge coincidence or the groups are working together in some way. It could be unintentional but the lack of chaos and abundance of coordination and similar movements from different groups is clear." Jordan finished, looking at everyone else for potential input.

  The Commander simply looked at the time-lapse, his smile almost seeming to disappear into the mask of his serious expression. It was still there, but overshadowed in a way, making me curious what he was thinking. "This...is very good Jordan, we will definitely have to look into this further. Good work." He spoke, authority and pride for Jordan in his tone.

  I wasn't sure the others noticed but he seemed to hold something back, the pause and hesitation at the beginning of his sentence seeming out of character. It could be nothing but the man obviously knew something, or maybe he was just concerned. Either way, I sat and listened to the team go over strategy, performance, and a few teasing remarks and jokes thrown around. The team really did seem close, their comradery apparent, it was all I could hope to truly be apart of that. I couldn't remember anything I was before this, I had knowledge and a baseline understanding but with no substance. I didn't know if I had any family to go back to, and with the world in ruin as we knew it this would be my new life. I don't know if it was a deep subconscious fear, but I was alright with not remembering.

  This could be a new beginning, a rebirth into who I now was, I could reinvent myself however I wanted. In my mind this was both what I wanted, but not what I needed. It was the easy way out, and I knew that, but I also knew that I couldn't handle anything else. Having been staring at the table and completely lost in the conversation I heard my name being shouted.

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  "Xavier?"

  Coming back to the moment, I blinked and looked around, my breath erratic. I swallowed and regained control over my breathing, and looked toward the source of the shout. Commander Caeruleus stared back at me and started speaking once more.

  "Alright, it's time for the huge lore drop, boy, the ol' explainer, if you will. This information will flip your worldview and potentially make you question everything you thought you knew. Wait, no, that but is for the next section." The Commander muttered, looking down at his tablet to seemingly get his facts straight. "Ah, yes, this bit will just be some basic information you'll need to know." He said.

  The others had confused expressions but kept quiet and listened on in rapt attention.

  Continuing, the man took in a breath and spoke. "

  "It has been 23 days since the world-ending event known as the Crimson Haze. As the name may imply, a red wave of energy spread across the world and made changes in certain individuals. We call these individuals, Crimson Humans. With Super Human, The Enhanced, and Monsters being commonly used terms as well. Most that had been affected by the Crimson Haze were in a mindless rage. Ravaging all they could with no consideration for anything but their own desires. The classification we use for these individuals is Crimson Ragers, but obviously a select few do not show such characteristics. Although they are few and far between, there are those that hold a strong enough Mind, Will, and Soul to fight off the overpowering sense of desire." Commander Caeruleus stated casually before continuing, answering one of my many questions.

  "And yes, souls are real, and I'll talk about it more later, information that the team has yet to hear about. Anyways, unfortunately, even those with strong M.W.S., Mind, Will, and Soul, respectively, are not scott-free. The influence is still there; depending on M.W.S., it could be mild, nonexistent, prominent, or anywhere in between. The classification we use for these individuals is Crimson Defenders. Those just on the edge are rare, but not a lost cause." The commander went on, stopping for a second to give me a knowing and confident look.

  "In cases where one was able to resist the initial transformation, the likelihood they would be able to withstand the negative desires was high. But even then, everyone had eventually passed out and been In a coma. This was until 3 days after the Crimson Haze, when everyone in a coma regained consciousness. Everyone except for those in Bureau facilities being monitored. We were able to keep them under while we did research on them. Thier background, experiences, and response to the Crimson Haze from witnesses all taken into account. The most promising individuals are here with us today with many others still in comas. Other individuals are being processed and going through the initiation at this very moment to see if they are eligible for joining a team." He finished, putting down the tablet and seeming to be done with a script of sorts.

  "But there have been a few special circumstances, for instance, Xavier, John, Emily, and Brian. Each unique in their own rights but are all similar in being able to resist the negative desires on their own. There may be others with this capability but even in the most extreme cases nobody has been seen to be immune to extreme emotions so tread carefully at all times." He continued on, rambling about the teams structure, a bit about the facility, and a few stories about the exploits of the team. All of this for my benefit, up until now at least as he finally reached the end of the info dump and his face became serious. Or as serious as it could.

  "Alright, now, the information I'm about to share with the room is to stay in this room. Do not repeat anything you hear with anyone under any circumstances. Only the people in this room may be privy to this information. The only other individual in this entire facility aware of this information is the Captain, and it must stay this way." The Commander prefaced, his tone showing none of his previous mirth.

  He pulled out a file, a physical file. The word, Confidential, printed on the front. Now, where he pulled this file out from was a mystery. With everyone looking at him intently not a single person had noticed the file until it was in his hands. I knew this from the expressions on everyone's faces, even the stoic and bland Sam. Flipping it open he parsed through some papers, presumedly important documents, until he reached the desired piece of paper. Removing it from the file and closing it, he laid it on top and adjusted some reading glasses that also appeared out of nowhere.

  "I'll begin at the start, on a night like any other 23 days ago. Brian, an individual I mentioned before, and Jordans partner, was working a case like so many he had before. Brain, Jordan, and a small group of Agents from The Bureau, had been tracking a perp for almost a year and had finally cornered them. It may have seemed like any other case but it would end up being anything but. Brian was on edge, due to pressure from The Bureau, and his many failed cases. Something they orchestrated to keep him on his leash and motivated. The perp, Clark Everstein, had been working on a Quantum computer of sorts. The exact specifics are complicated but he was essentially creating a jailbroken Quantum computer with dangerous modifications. It would not have been too dissimilar to our very own Quantum computer but highly unstable and experimental. This is where things get a bit complicated. The Bureau obviously knew what Clark was doing, but vastly underestimated how far he could and would go. They, at most, wanted Clark back alive to use him and his innovative technology and intelligence. But worst case scenario wanted him dead and his device destroyed." He spoke, his tone entirely serious as he occasionally glanced at the piece of paper.

  "You may be wondering what this has to do with anything, but if you have been paying attention I expect you to have put things together. As Brain confronted Clark he had refused to cooperate, and Brian had open fired. If he were potentially in a better headspace he could have handled the whole situation much better but that is neither here nor there. In his attempt to incapacitate Clark, one his bullets struck the computer. Almost in the same instance, a barrier was formed around the Quantum computer. This is something The Bureau did not account for, they knew there would be a localized explosion if things went south but the scale was way beyond their predictions. The initial explosion was contained and was able to build upon itself and accumulate power." The Commander stopped for a second, thinking about how to phrase the next part.

  "This... along with the complete annihilation of a human soul made for the event known as Crimson Haze. Now, onto souls" He sighed, finding a few pieces of paper from the file before continuing. "I know when I mentioned soul to you all before, you had thought it to be an expression. However, they are indeed real, and more tangible than you all might first expect. The deeply abhorrent crimes and evils of The Bureau are intrinsically connected to trying to understand, control, and even create souls." He started.

  "The soul, an intrinsic part of every human being. In the same way that our brain connects to every part of our body, our entire existence is connected to our soul. And to put it into perspective, there is still much not understood about the brains inner workings. The soul, in it's operation and design, is infinitesimally more complex. But, just like the brain, there are 'easily' observable traits of the soul. We'll start out with the first and most easily understood, a great mystery of humans, our sapience and consciousness. This mystery is partly solved by the makeup of our brains, but this is only part of the picture. With the other facet of course being the soul. To put it in simple terms, our physical form is the product, while our soul is the code. I'll get into it more with my second point but for now have that in your mind. Now, even animals have souls, but only creatures with true sentience. Something like a jellyfish or coral won't have a soul, but a dog, or bird will. While these aren't hard set rules, this is what we have concluded based on the information we have been able to gather. With how little we know, it is impossible for there to be any certainty, but it is something. Now, the souls animals have are vastly different from humans, still extradentary complex, but not nearly as special. The soul of a human is what makes humans, human. At some point in our evolution a change occurred, a metamorphosis of sorts. This is what enabled us to develop a more complex brain and physiology, which in turn gave us sapience." He paused, assessing everyone in the room.

  Digesting everything he had said up until this point I drew myself into my mind. in the forefront of my mind was the bombshell of the soul, information I was very sure I had no recollection of. I instinctually understood the concepts he was speaking of, the information readily available, just without any context or memories attached. I knew what a dog, bird, jellyfish and coral was. I also knew what the brain was, and the basics. All the knowledge I possessed was there but with a strange disconnect. But I shook off the unsettling reality of it and withdrew from my mind and looked around at the others. They all had inquisitive looks on their face, as they mulled over this information. There was a bit of muttering between themselves and from what I gathered they had all heard the initial speech from the Commander and knew souls were a thing. I simply sat and waited for him to continue, my fascination overwriting any confusion or deeper concerns I had with my memory.

  For the soul is you, it holds the blueprint, the DNA, the personality, the ego, the deep characteristics that make up who and what you are.

  "Now, something a bit more complex and not readily understood is the mind and will. How strong one's mind is, is based on the quantity of the soul, with the will being determined by the quality. This, of course, is dumbing it down quite heavily, but even I can understand it in these terms." The man chucked, his first break in the serious one he had set. he returned to his serious persona once more and continued. "The will and mind, and ostensibly who you are is stored within the brain. The soul shapes the brain, like I said before, creation and code. The soul is you, it holds the blueprint, the DNA, the personality, the ego, the code, the deep characteristics that make up who and what you are. This is a grand fundamental that has been the focus of The Bureau's studies. It is the basic understanding that brings everything else into context, which is used to understand the soul itself. I could have explained this better, but I'm no expert, and the information on these pages are near incomprehensible. I'm explaining things how I understood them, but if you wish to have a different source Ash knows the most out of almost everyone on the planet. anyway, one who has a powerful soul is nothing if they don't apply themselves. At the end of the day you are responsible for the quality and quantity of your soul. For example, in M.W.S the mind and will aspects need to be nurtured. The soul that is referenced here is your souls ultimate potential. Your soul will have a certain limit, for some it isn't very large and for others it is. This is simply something you are born with, and from what we understand can't be altered, but nothing is impossible these days. But those with a strong soul, i.e. greater potential, will have an easier time nurturing their mind and will but the work is still required. Complacency is the killer of talent, and no matter how powerful your soul it will not be easy. There is a lot more to the soul but this is the most commonly known, and even this is a simplistic view of it and only really a small part of the big picture. The takeaway is the soul exists and is important, and the more you understand it, the stronger you will become. All of this was barely important before you became Crimson Humans, but now it is imperative. But don't fret, you don't need to understand the soul to understand your own soul. Knowing the basics and as much as you can will help, but deep down it's more instinctual and personal. Now, back to the events of the Crimson Haze. With the Quantum computer being contained in a relatively small radius, there was nowhere for the energy to disperse with the barrier being powerful enough to contain the initial explosion. With nowhere to go the energy condensed. With Clark being consumed by the explosion, he was disintegrated, but his soul remained. I never touched on this but the soul obviously isn't very physical, at least not in the normal context. With what knowledge we have and what we've gathered from The Bureau, nobody knows what exactly happens with a soul when someone dies. But what we suspect is that Clarks soul was affected by the energy powering the Quantum computer. A very volatile and powerful energy. Something us and The Bureau haven't completely understood. Only enough to 'safely' use it to enable technology considered impossible. Moving on, this energy, in this new volatile state, condensed into a solid ball. A solid ball that held Clarks soul inside. Earlier I said that Clarks soul was 'annihilated' but this is only a theory. It could have 'destroyed' a part of it, or absorbed it, or something else we aren't entirely sure. This whole event is unprecedented and obviously a first. But what we are sure about is that the energy powering the Quantum computer couldn't have created such a reaction by itself. Something had to of empowered it exponentially. As the energy condensed further and further, accumulating power, it finally broke free of the barrier. The release of energy shooting straight up into the upper atmosphere before getting stuck and washing down, covering the entire planet."

  He once again paused, letting his ongoing rant set upon us before picking back up.

  "Now, the outcome of this wasn't a complete Suprise to The Bureau, or us for that matter. There had been experiments with this unique red energy and how it affected the soul and individual as a whole. However, everything from these experiments had been redacted many years ago, so we don't know if anything came of it." The Commander said, but something in his tone revealed he wasn't being completely honest. There seemed like more to what he was saying that he was hiding, but it could have simply been in my head.

  "It's hard to say what The Bureau knows and doesn't, as we were once all apart of The Bureau we all have information, and some of it being confidential. Although there is still much we do not know, and with how prepared The Bureau was to deal with a crisis like this, it's completely possible this was within their expectations. Not to contradict myself, as they obviously didn't expect the outcome of Clark and Brian to be the Crimson Haze, but they clearly knew it could happen. To some extent at least, as they had evacuation plans and technology that could detect Crimson Humans. Well, more the energy than the Crimson Humans themselves, but the very fact they have sensors has implications. Sorry, I got off track, I've told you all this so you understand the full extent of what has happened. You are at the epicenter of all of this chaos, so it's important to be in the know. While what has happened is a tragedy, there is still an opportunity to strike. The Bureau has had such exact control on the world up until now. And even if they still seem in control they are shaken, and we must use this advantage if we wish to save the world. As grand as moral as it may sound I am asking you all to continue to risk your lives and fight this threat. None of you had much of a say in all of this, but I believe you are our biggest hope." He once again looked my way, as if his words were more directed towards me then the collective. A shiver ran down my spine, the implications of everything he said sinking in.

  "I'll open the floor for questions or anything else that anyone wishes to address, one at a time though."

  For another hour or so everyone discussed this information and asked questions. Every question was an intelligent one, at least from everyone but Braden, who kept going on about how his soul could help him kick better. I chimed in every once in awhile but mainly listened and absorbed all the information I could. Emily looking my way every once in awhile from across the table. Things sure were interesting to say the least, and I knew things were only going to get more chaotic. But Commander Caeruleus' explanation of the soul resonated with me. Like things had clicked into place, and I truly felt optimistic for the first time since I could remember, which wasn't all that much.