It seemed that in this place, Elias was in his true element. Cigarette smoke wreathed his body as he slipped deftly past the crowds, his overt rebelliousness no longer a point of contention. It was as if a shark had finally been released into its home waters. The sight was nothing short of spellbinding. And so Felix followed him, guided by a light hand and a burgeoning desire to know the previously unknown—the same desire that forced his gaze to sweep across the entirety of the club.

  He recognized almost everyone there. Some from church, others through their parents, school, hospitals, or the myriad other events where such a disparate public gathers. How jarring it was to witness the depravity of those he had deemed sufficiently righteous... he felt a sudden impulse to approach the teenagers for a serious talk, but the urge to remain unnoticed was stronger. To his surprise, Felix spotted adults as well. Most of them stood by the bar, conversing with a certain woman.

  It was startling to realize he was seeing such a lady for the first time. Long, dark, curly hair shot through with vibrant red strands draped over her bare back, while an elegant black dress was accentuated by a white, plush wrap and clearly expensive jewelry set with precious stones. She was smoking a strange, long pipe of dark wood with a metal tip. A connoisseur would have recognized the piece as a Chinese kiseru.

  Such a woman could not help but command attention, and for Felix, who had spent his entire life in the House of God, it was strange to realize she had clearly never once set foot in a church.

  “Elias, who—” he turned to his companion, only to find him gone. “Elias?”

  Felix looked around in bewilderment, trying to find that achingly familiar silhouette in the crowd, and only then did he feel the eyes on him. It seemed as though everyone had noticed the arrival of a new face and was now staring. They burned into him, scrutinizing his features through the neon blur. Like an animal in a zoo... A sickening feeling coiled in his stomach. His heart hammered wildly in his chest, aching against his ribs. Fear—verging on panic—enveloped Felix completely when he noticed a man moving toward him. Bauer couldn’t recall his name, but he knew for certain it was a young man recently returned from the army, whose grandmother the priest had visited in the hospital and, eventually, seen off on her final journey. This man would surely recognize him; there wasn’t the slightest chance of keeping his presence here a secret. Bauer didn't know if he looked suspicious, but a primal instinct forced his gaze to the floor to hide his face, and he stepped back. He moved with the same slow, deliberate pace as the man approaching him. His heart began to beat even harder, its thrumming in his ears drowning out the loud music, while his lungs felt as though they were caught in a vise, making every breath impossibly heavy. His hands began to shake, and a chill locked his entire body. Suddenly, old wounds began to ache: the belt, the candle wax. None of this would be happening if only he hadn't been so easily led... If he had fought back from the start...

  “...lix!” The voice pierced the roar of blood in his ears, and a warm palm suddenly cupped his cheek, turning his head aside and shielding him from the crowd. “Father Felix, are you alright?”

  “I...” He faltered, his eyes darting across the club once more before meeting Elias’s gaze. “It’s loud in here.”

  “I left you for a mere two minutes,” the youth smiled tenderly, his thumb briefly stroking the rough skin of Felix's cheek, “and you’re already lost?”

  “This isn't my place regardless...”

  He moved to pull away, but Elias caught the back of his head and drew him closer, tucking Felix’s face against his shoulder. The young soldier approached them, nodding in greeting, but Huber took a cautionary step back.

  “Huber, is this one with you..?”

  “Miss Ehrenfeld’s new guest,” Elias replied with a predatory smile, shielding Bauer behind his back. “Pay no mind. Everyone here looks like someone else. Besides, we don’t care for people who are too observant.”

  Catching the undisguised threat in those dark eyes, the young man nodded understandingly and slowly vanished into the crowd. Even realizing the danger had passed, Felix couldn't calm his frantically beating heart. He was almost certain he’d been exposed. Truly, what an idiot he was to believe a short-sighted youth, to voluntarily walk into a den of sin just to know Huber better, hoping for some ephemeral chance to remain unnoticed and...

  “Father Felix, do you intend to keep pressing yourself against me?”

  The playful tone snapped him out of his stupor. Felix stepped back so abruptly he nearly collided with a girl standing nearby. He was flustered; he coughed awkwardly, adjusted his sleeves and glasses, and cast a quick glance at the crowd. Seeing that no eyes were on them, he finally seemed to settle.

  “You are jeopardizing my privacy...” Embarrassed, he nudged his glasses up, trying to regain his composure. “Who is Miss Ehrenfeld?”

  Elias’s lips stretched into a thin smile as he shot a sly look toward the bar. It spoke louder than words. That striking lady in the white fur, currently talking to a man, had been glancing at Elias from time to time, but apparently didn't want to intrude on his space prematurely. Felix couldn't help but appreciate such a polite gesture.

  “You should go to her.”

  “Why would I?”

  “She seems to be waiting for it.”

  “But I am with you. Where would I go?”

  “At least say hello.”

  Elias looked visibly puzzled by the situation. On one hand, he hadn't been summoned; on the other... something wasn't quite right. He couldn't leave the poor priest in the crowd—Felix was right, a new face drew attention. A flurry of thoughts raced through his head, culminating in a decision. Elias placed a hand gently between Bauer’s shoulder blades and nudged him forward. Toward a partially open door upholstered in velvet. The bouncer standing beside it didn't even attempt to stop them.

  The priest was ushered into a small room furnished with three comfortable sofas, a small table in the center, a pole, and dimmer lighting. Felix didn't have time to look around properly, but he noted that the music was barely audible here. Finally, he could rest from the visual and sensory noise that had been crushing his mind. He sank onto the soft sofa, habitually straightening his back, and looked up at Elias, who was already heading back out. Elias managed only a quick “I’ll be right back!” before closing the door behind him.

  Huber exhaled and leaned his back against the padded door. Running a hand through his hair to tousle the strands, he gave the bouncer a friendly pat on the shoulder.

  “Don’t let anyone in. My guest wishes to remain confidential,” the youth said quietly, adding after a brief pause, “And don’t let him leave.”

  The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

  He waited for an affirmative nod before walking away. He headed for the bar with wide, confident strides, throwing his arms out in a characteristic gesture and flashing his best, trademark smile.

  “Marlene, a pleasure to see you!”

  The woman with the heavy curls turned to him, exhaling a plume of tobacco smoke as her stern, serious expression lit up with genuine joy. She didn't stand, but she opened herself up to him completely, one hand remaining on the bar while the other reached out. Elias immediately caught her hand and kissed the back of it, warming her slender fingers in his large palm.

  “My God, and I thought my eyes were deceiving me!” She gently withdrew her hand, touching the youth’s shoulder. “Elias, darling, I’d almost managed to forget you...”

  “We’ve only missed each other for a month,” he pouted theatrically and sighed. “Ah, Miss Ehrenfeld, you really don't look after your employees—making them work nights while you disappear to God knows where...”

  “Complaining, Ellie?” She smiled mischievously, propping her cheek on her fist. “Careful, or I’ll demote you from broker to bouncer—or sell you into escort service. Then you'll have something to talk about!”

  “On the contrary, no complaints!” Elias protested quickly, sharing her amusement. “Where else would you find someone as wonderful as me?”

  “I’ll have to ask my brother where he picked you up, my boy,” the woman replied affectionately. “But tell me, Ellie, why are you here off the clock, and who was that you brought in? I thought you preferred older women, not men. Have your priorities shifted?”

  “Well...” he cast a pensive glance toward the VIP room door. “Something like that?”

  Their light conversation continued for a while, punctuated by laughter and mutual teasing, until Elias began to grow visibly anxious about the delay. Time always flowed seamlessly and swiftly with Marlene—that was just the kind of person she was—but he had no desire to leave Felix alone. Even for a short while. It seemed Ehrenfeld caught his agitation immediately and grew concerned herself. However, respecting Elias’s streak of independence, she didn't pry. She simply gave a short wave to the bartender, whispering with a quiet, playful lilt, “Give my boy his motivation.” One could only hope it would help him settle.

  * * *

  Every minute stretched like an eternity. And as they mounted, so did Felix's anxiety. The simple rubbing of his fingers progressed to a rhythmic tapping of his foot, then into a slight tremor. There had been far too much stress over the past few months... He was entirely unaccustomed to it. Just as he was unaccustomed to being alone in an enclosed space for so long. Usually, he was surrounded by parishioners, Katharina, his wife—or, at the very least, he was alone with the Lord. But God was certainly not in this place.

  He flinched as the door swung open and looked up. A tense, focused Elias, a fixed half-smile on his face, entered the room far too quickly and flopped onto the sofa opposite him. He scrutinized Felix, licking his dry lips, and draped his arms over the back of the sofa, crossing his legs.

  “You’re shaking.”

  “It’s cold in here,” Felix countered, trying to relax. He failed.

  “Liar.” Elias turned away as if the sight had become unpleasant, though that frozen smile remained. “You’re always afraid when you’re seen for who you truly are.”

  “Shouldn’t we be leaving?” Felix tried to change the subject, feeling goosebumps prickle his skin.

  “Why? Don’t be so afraid; there’s no one here but me. Your sincerity is still confidential.” Elias rubbed his nose, as if trying to steady himself. “Do you think God hasn't seen people like this? You aren't unique, Father Felix.” He looked him straight in the eye now, like a predator. “You aren't the first. Certainly not for me, and even less so for God.”

  The words hit harder than Huber had intended. An emptiness struck Felix’s chest so sharply it made him slouch. Now he truly was cold, but this chill blossomed from within, searing everything in its path.

  “You don't know what you're talking about, Elias,” Felix whispered, unable to find the strength to square his shoulders as he clenched his fingers. “The Lord has already seen that I am here. I shouldn't have followed you at all. You know that.”

  “Perhaps. But you are here, aren't you? God didn't stop you—His favorite righteous man. Then, surely, you aren't doing anything wrong, right? Otherwise, you would have been set back on the path of righteousness.”

  “I am the one who provides guidance here,” Felix replied, his voice wavering with uncertainty.

  “Father, I can see that you don't want to,” Elias said, wetting his lips again; it seemed the talking was making his jaw ache. “You won't leave now because you know there’s nothing wrong with what's happening. Would the Lord not allow you to undergo your trials of faith and return to the true path? You are vain.”

  “I am not—”

  “And you want to allow yourself more.” Suddenly, he stood and, with a sharp, lunging movement, crawled closer to Felix. He gripped the priest's shoulder, slowly pinning him against the wall. “You can only test your faith and be sure of it if you subject yourself to a true trial. Come now. This is a veritable den of sin, and God won't see your fall. But He will appreciate your return.”

  Elias leaned toward lips parted in shock and horror, but Bauer jerked his head away... and immediately regretted it. Because he felt something warm—hot, even—and wet touch his throat, right by his Adam’s apple. A tongue, he realized instantly. His breathing quickened, and the frantic thrum of his heart deafened him once more. Even his ribs began to ache as Elias pressed a soft kiss into the curve of his neck, behind his ear, burying his nose in his hair. He was moving far too much—touching Felix’s chest, his wrists, unbuttoning several buttons on his shirt, then his belt, then touching himself. It felt as if he were filling the entire space, enveloping Felix in heat and the scent of his body. He smelled of warmth and something sharp, like a man who hadn't slept in a long time and was now overflowing with nervous energy. Felix didn't notice how he mellowed under the touch, like one leaning into a furnace; he didn't notice how he closed his eyes and stopped recoiling. However, now, in a moment of lucidity untainted by the fog of fear, he felt his trousers being unzipped and strong fingers sliding lower, squeezing his pelvic bones.

  Felix jerked almost instantly, seizing Elias by the wrists to hold him back. The sheer fracture of pain and fear reflected so strongly in his eyes that Huber froze for a moment.

  “Elias, don't do this...” Felix whispered, barely audible. “I’m asking you.”

  “And your body disagrees,” Elias prattled playfully, trailing a nail across his lower abdomen and eliciting a shiver. “It seems God disagrees with you too, as nothing is stopping me. However, I will stop...” he withdrew his hands briefly, “if you ask.” And immediately after, with a foul smile, he returned them. “But you aren't stopping me, just as you haven't stopped me before.”

  Felix felt something within him shudder and snap. His breath hitched; he lost his footing. For the first time, he didn't know what to say, and for the first time, he didn't understand what he was supposed to do. He was still gripping Elias’s wrists—his muscles weren't relaxed—but he wasn't stopping him. He no longer tried to push the other's hands away; he said nothing. And that was what hit him the hardest. More than Elias’s words, it was his own thought that stole his breath:

  ?I’m doing nothing. I’m not stopping him.?

  Now he couldn't even accuse Elias of coercion or hide behind God, seeking His protection. If he had wanted to, he would have stopped him. It had been the same the first time. Yet he was allowing this fall from grace to happen, for there was something in Elias that gave him no reason to refuse. What was it...

  His thoughts became viscous, rolling sluggishly through his mind, while every second seemed to last an eternity. The music drifting from behind the door felt distant and elusive, even as Felix felt all his senses sharpen. In contrast to his yielding body, he was acutely aware of the heat from Elias’s hands as they slid into his underwear to stroke his fully hardened flesh. He felt the dry kisses on his neck; he winced at a sudden bite through the fabric and felt himself being pressed down into the sofa.

  Felix flinched in horror, distracted from the pleasant heat, when Elias caught his hands and guided them toward his own groin, inviting him to do the same.

  “Go on, try it,” Elias egged him on.

  “What... what?” He tried to pull himself together, but it was terribly difficult and the air felt thin.

  “You’ve never done this to another man, am I right?” Elias leaned over him, pinning him down even harder. “Have you ever pleasured yourself, Father?”

  Felix didn't notice his ears turning red at the memory. He had washed that particular unholiness off himself with ice-cold water; that same unholiness had been beaten out of him with a lash. But now... what were they doing now? Felix turned his head away and tried to breathe steadily, but he knew that wouldn't happen today. This was a sin he would be praying away for a very long time. Longer than the last, because he was already undoing Elias’s belt, tugging at the fly, and touching the erection with trembling fingers. The response was an encouraging groan against his reddened ear. The heat of the engorged, firm member burned even through the fabric, but he pressed his entire palm gently against the groin, not moving, only squeezing slightly. Elias rocked his hips forward in return, his own hand moving more harshly, more forcefully...

  They pleasured each other only with their hands. No kissing, no undressing, no talking—only the occasional caught moan. The sofa creaked beneath them, and when Felix began to move his hand more boldly, Elias broke into a raspy groan. His mind was simply reeling at the thought that Felix was being so lewd beneath him, moaning and slick with natural lubrication, finally doing something in return, as if accepting his sin.

  The cramped room quickly became stifling and hot. With jerky movements, Elias pulled his shirt off with one hand and tossed it somewhere onto the floor. Felix, however, refused to undress. If anything, looking at the naked Elias had become even more difficult, and he began to feel excessively exposed despite being fully clothed. So he edged closer and wrapped his free arm around Huber. Felix bit his tongue and groaned hoarsely, holding his breath for several seconds as a hot hand made a particularly palpable pass over his length. Trying to stave off the orgasm, he ran his fingers across Elias’s back... unexpectedly brushing against something uneven and rough. But there was no time to think about it. The youth squeezed him even harder, his other hand sliding lower to press against the tender spot beneath the scrotum, a small knot of tension that became exquisitely sensitive just before the peak. He had no strength left to hold on. Sparks exploded behind his tightly shut eyelids, darting and swirling. The blood rushed to Felix’s cheeks with renewed force; he didn't realize he was gripping Elias harder until he felt the youth shaking violently. He spent himself without even removing his underwear.