So the super secret prisons of Konoha are a unique tourist destination. Definitely a unique experience. The cold stone floor was doing its part to stop the nausea and dizziness that decided to join their friend, Mr Massive Pounding Headache to keep me company.

  Massive pounding headache, M P H. that kinda sounds like N P H. Neil Patrick Harris. He was pretty great in Harold and Kumar go to white castle…..OOOOHhhhh sliders.

  I should make sliders. Maybe when the floor starts spinning. I mean stops. Stops. Stoooops. Sthaaap? Is that the word? Word. Wurd?

  I thought the Bird was the word. The bird is the word. Bird Bird buuuuurd. Burrd. Burt Maclin FBI. Bird Patrick Harris. Birdie Howser. How.

  [Severe concussion detected. Medical treatment available 1000 system credits. Current balance 34023 system credits. Would you like treatment? Y/N ]

  [ No response given. Automatic treatment beginning.]

  [Healing Complete]

  Oh. Damn. Wait, how many credits did that say? I'm pretty sure I didn't have that many before.

  [ Five minutes till Multiversal travel. Please proceed to the bonded vehicle.]

  [You are over 400 meters away from the bonded vehicle. Please make your way to the vehicle promptly. ]

  [Please make your way to the vehicle promptly]

  [Emergency teleport to bonded vehicle will commence at the cost of ten thousand system credits in one minute.]

  This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.

  Well. Damn. Damn. Damn. “Beam me up Scotty. I can't get out of here on my own.”

  [Emergency teleport proceeding]

  —

  POV Fujimoto Ren

  It was regrettable that we had to knock out the crazed food salesman codenamed Eggman. However he was speaking of things that should barely be whispered behind closed government doors, not spoken out loud in a marketplace. If Root had found him first… I shudder to think about it.

  We locked him in an Anbu safehouse prison. He was out cold from the hit I gave him, but he should be ok in a few hours. The Hokage won’t be available to meet with him till morning anyway.

  I had a mountain of paperwork to fill out from all this, and it took hours. The last thing to do to wrap this up is go to the apartment he rented and move his property into the safe house storage.

  As I approached the apartment a flash of light came from within. I ran up to the window to see Eggman holding onto his food cart. Thousands of tiny swirling yellow lights danced around him. A sound erupted. It was a sound of dozens of tiny bells chiming and metal knives being repeatedly sharpened on braided steel wire.

  He then looked at me. I had my Anbu mask on, so I'm sure he didn't recognize me, but he waved. Then, it stopped. The lights, the sound, the man, gone. The apartment was empty.

  I walked into the room. There was a large bag of popcorn left on the floor, and a note.

  The note read:

  Eggs, Milk (room temp), Flour, salt, butter.

  You will need a special pan, iron or steel. Small cups about the size of a fist. Oven should be very hot.

  I would write the rest of it, but I don't have a lot of time. Good luck with your nephews.

  I'm not angry about the hit, because knowing how frustrated you will be trying to make popovers even close to the ones I gave you from this recipe makes me feel like we are even.

  Signed The Guy who lost his name aka “Eggman”

  PS. Share some of your failed popover attempts with the demon fox kid. Someone needs to look out for him.