Chapter 5: The End of Beta

  Since I knew that I would get rewards no matter what happened not, the next two challenges almost seemed anti-climactic, just kidding. The next challenge I decided to tackle was the water element. Long story short, the water golem was poisoned. I defeated it with my water purifying tablets, but not before I almost drowned while simultaneously being poisoned. Not a fun experience. Luckily, or maybe by design, the loot drop for this golem was a small case with a green cross on it. The note inside said they were recovery pills that would remove abnormal statuses. Translation, it would cure the poison.

  After the water golem I decided to take a break before trying the last challenge. I was down to a single health pill, two recovery pills, and was completely wiped out physically and mentally. After a nap, a meal, and making use of the little boy’s room on the far side of the cave I feel much better. Mental note to self, add toilet paper to bug out bag. Using a sock is not fun and now I only have one clean sock. Alright it is time to start the final challenge.

  The last challenge element is Air. I have no idea what to expect on this one. If the golem is made out of air how would I even, see it? Would it glow? Will I need to breathe on it to kill it? Oh well let’s see what it actually is. As I entered the last challenge cavern the now familiar blue screen popped up.

  Great it is a repeat of challenge one. I am going to have to get close enough to breathe on this thing which means it is going to be able to hurt me bad. I stare that the wall waiting for the air golem to step out. All of the sudden the wall starts to crackle and spark. That is no air golem! God damn you screwed up game logic. That’s a lightning golem. OK don’t panic, do I even have anything that can beat that thing?

  I am running out of time, it’s already started the standard if you beat me blah blah get the blessing speech. Think Mark think. What is lightning? Lightning is a collection or movement of electrons, its energy, and its fast, do I have anything that matches that description? My train of thought is interrupted by the sight of a miniature lightning bolt heading my direction. I don’t have time to dodge and my machete being metal takes a direct hit. I start twitching in pain from the residual electrical effects that arced into my body.

  That could have ended much worse if the metal in the machete had not attracted the lightning bolt and the rubber grip helped to partially insulate me. Wait, electricity is the answer. I do not know if this screwed up GREAT GAME will acknowledge my brilliance. Only one way to find out. I take out my flashlight as quick as I can and start to open it up. Please let this work. As soon as the batteries hit my hand I toss them at the lightning golem. Too late it launched another bolt at me before they could reach it. The last thing I remember before blacking out is severe pain, and falling towards the floor.

  Uhh, why do I hurt so bad? Did I sleep wrong? What is that smell? I slowly blink my eyes awake. Hanging in front of me is one of those stupid blue boxes. I guess it wasn’t just a bad dream.

  As soon as I finish reading the notice the box disappears. Wow, I survived. From the way I feel it must have been a close thing, and what is that awful smell. It smells like a combination of bacon, sewage, and burnt hair. Oh wait that’s me. I must have lost control of my bowels after that last big shock. Thank god I keep a change of clothes in my bug out bag.

  After cleaning myself up as best I can and swallowing my last healing pill I feel like a new man, or at least one that can function long enough to get home. I stumble over to where I last saw that stupid lightning golem. I mean seriously, I know that lightning happens in the sky which is full of “air” but that sucked. What is that? Bonus, there is both a red cross box and a glowing white gem. I collect everything and repack in preparation for going home.

  There it is, the final passage with the glowing EXIT sign above it. I can finally leave this place, rest up, think and plan what I’m going to do next. I walk through cautiously, afraid that I will be sent somewhere other than back home. There is the screen I want to see,

  My couch, never have I been so happy as to see my couch. As I collapse onto the couch I see another blue screen,

  What? What body modifications? I never agreed to any of this.

  Dear God the pain! Arrghhh! I pass out for the second time today.

  As I slowly blink the sleep from my eyes I noticed I was on the couch. Huh, I must have fallen asleep watching T.V. last night. What a bizarre dream. It all seemed so real, but the good dreams always do. Oh well back to the real world.

  I stumble towards the bathroom to take care of my morning business. Wow I must have been really tired last night. I even fell asleep in my clothes. As I leaned over the toilet to help improve my sleepy morning aim, I thought to myself how cool would it be though if it was real. Just think status and,

  Oh Jesus, that blue screen popped up as soon as I thought status. That means it was not a dream. Man what do I do now. First things first, how do I turn this screen off so I can finish my morning business. The other screens just faded away. This one is staying in front of me but is transparent enough to see through. That is probably a safety feature so no one is blinded by alerts.

  I know how about I use HELP. The status screen disappears only to be replaced by,

  Hmmm... Do I just think my question and this guide will answer me?

  Ok that was a little creepy. Let’s try it out. How can I remove game screens from my view?

  Help Off. It worked. I quickly finish my morning rituals in the bathroom and retreat to my thinking spot.

  Once I have relocated to the recliner I start my brainstorming session. Ok I remember being surprised by a green screen, being given almost no time to prepare, dick move by the way Great Game, luckily I had my go bag, I bumbled my way through the beginning of the challenges, got extremely lucky, and barely survived. Then at the end something about body modifications then waking back up.

  Wait, body modifications! Oh crap. I run towards my daughter’s room and stand in front of the only full length mirror in the house. What the hell? The game must have put me on a diet. I must be 50-75 pounds skinnier. I am not a twig by any means, but I have lost a lot of weight. Was that the only change? Maybe the help screen can answer some questions. HELP.

  Can you explain the body modification process?

  Can you give me an example please?

  Why is body modification so painful?

  Wow, I am pretty sure the help menu just called me fat. How rude, accurate, but rude. So my new physique is just a reflection of my new stats.

  How are ability points earned?

  I must have gotten my extra points from being the first to pass the beta test. I will save my unspent points until I am sure of all the ramifications of using them.

  How are levels usually gained?

  When will this world fully enter into the Great Game?

  Can you explain each stage?

  Can you please elaborate on monster classes?

  That is an extremely thorough explanation. What about technological limits, what can I expect to happen after changeover?

  I read a lot of fantasy and LitRPG books and I think I can summarize or guess about these restrictions. If I make guesses about restrictions can you confirm or deny them for me?

  I was hoping that this loophole would work. Ok think about all of those stories you have read over the years. What was common between them all? Many stories bring technology down to a level that would reduce pollution and allow mother nature to regenerate the planet. This would mean no large scale fossil fuel burning, or anything above cottage scale or minor electrical generation. The system already said that energy storage would be altered so no batteries. No nuclear detonations or decay to prevent world-wide problems. However, in some stories work-around tech is acknowledged and used.

  Help screen, will technology still work as long as it is powered or energy stored by a magical alternative?

  Will guns and weapons that use chemical reactions cease to function?

  If a magical propellant or alternative is created will those firearm types be allowed?

  Have magical firearms, batteries, and explosives been used successfully in the Great Game before?

  Help Off.