“YES!!! FUCK YES! FINALLY!!!” Jim cried out as he rejoiced in Derek’s Bedroom.

  Thrusting his arms up in the air, the dim-witted teen sang, “We’re goin’ to a Kegger! A Kegger! We’re gonna get fucked up! Fucked up! We’re gonna get laid! LAID!!!”

  Having enough of Jim’s ‘ignorant chants and rejoices’ about being invited to Josh Russell’s Party out at his parents’ Cabin in Shimmick Recreational Forest tonight at eleven, Eric shouted, “Oh, for the love of God… SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY!!! You’ve been singing that SAME IGNORANT-ASS song since we left the Mall THREE FUCKING HOURS ago!!!”

  “HEY! CHILLAX, BROSICLE,” Jim erupted. “I’m just PUMPED, is all!”

  “CONGRATS, JIM!” Sam falsely commended whilst laying on top of Derek’s bed. “You’ve ACTUALLY been invited to a ‘quote on quote’ MAJOR ‘social event’ that one of, if not, the MOST popular (and very good looking) guys in our school is hosting. Brava, my good man! BRAVA!!! Heh, heh, heh…”

  Smirking at the tomboy, Jim said whilst winking his right eyes at her, “Thanks, babe!”

  Sam’s gleeful expression soon faded as she said in a harsh and blunt tone, “I was being sarcastic, you doof.”

  The Douchey Dingus’s smile instantly faded as Sam continued, “It’s nothing special getting invited to a House Party, Jim. I get invited to them, Bonfires, AND KEGGERS all the time… And if you EVER call me ‘babe’ again I will fucking CASTRATE you. Got it?”

  Jim’s eyes widened and mouth dropped in unison.

  “And Sammy ‘The Burn’ Moore drops Jimbo ‘the Dingus’ Hunter with a VERBAL haymaker to the jaw!” Kyle erupted. “THE CROWD GOES WILD!!!! HA-HA!”

  Kyle, Eric, and Sam then all cupped their hands around their mouths and started making ‘wispy’ noises to make themselves sound like members of a massive crowd of people.

  Waving his ‘friends’ off, Jim snapped, “YEAH, YEAH! Laugh it up, peeps! THE FACT OF THE MATTER is that we NEVER get invited to parties… Excluding Sam and now, by some ‘DIVINE MIRACLE’, we actually have and you all act like it’s not a big deal!”

  “That’s because it isn’t a ‘big deal’, Jim,” Kyle replied.

  “Yeah,” Sam added. “Like I said before, I get invited to them all of the time, Jim. I just don’t go because what’s the point?”

  “TO GAIN ETERNAL GLORY AND FAME!!!” Jim shouted dumbly.

  Closing his eyes and shaking his head, Eric groaned, “God, you are SO dumb.”

  “Glory and fame, huh?” Sam mocked as Jim flashed a quick glare over at Eric. “That’s really interesting, Jim, because when it comes to one of these ‘prestigious’ gatherings it’s usually compiled of a bunch of IGNORANT JOCKS… Like Brent Fuller, for instance, who is trying to get smashed and laid while STUCK-UP, DEBUTANT BITCHES… Like Layla Check and Amber Swanson, cover over ONE HUNDRED AND A FIFTY PERCENT of their truly UGLY faces with all the damn makeup in their purses just so they can ‘look pretty’ for, like, TWO AND A HALF HOURS. UGH… GOD! GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK!”

  “Jeez, Sam. Rage much?” Kyle asked the smoldering Tomboy.

  “All the time,” Sam smirked.

  Kyle sent a smirk right back to her as Jim said, “Uh, well… I dunno about all that shit you just said, Sam, but I know that ONE THING’S for sure.”

  “That you’re a fucking moron?” Eric barbed at the Dingus.

  “WRONG-O, ERICKSON!!!” Jim seared, angering Eric instantly. “Free beer… FREE BEER, I SAY!!!”

  Jim then threw his right fist back into the air as Kyle chuckled, “Heh, heh… I know this ‘may’ sound crazy, guys… AND GIRL, but Jim kinda has a point.”

  Eric stared at Kyle in shock now as Sam glumly added, “He’s right… SADLY. If you guys wanna ‘drink for FREE’ tonight, then Josh’s Party is the place to be.”

  “YOU BET’YO SWEET ASS IT IS!!!” Jim snapped, causing Sam to glare at him again. “I don't know about you losers, but I am NOT the one to turn down FREE FUCKING BEER! It would be sacrilegious!”

  “Ugh… Jim, CALM DOWN,” Kyle sighed. “We’re gonna go, alright?”

  You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.

  “We better… WE FUCKIN’ BETTER, KY-KY,” Jim threatened. “Or else I swear to GOD that this friendship is OVER!!!”

  Eric immediately looked over at Kyle and said, “GORDON, DON’T GO. You’ve been given a chance to FINALLY get away from this dumbass. PLEASE, for the love of God, just take the damn chance… FOR ALL OF OUR SAKES!!!”

  “SHUT UP, ERIC!” Jim snapped at the stoner.

  Eric, in reply, ‘flipped the bird’ at Jim, who was about to shout something back again until a loud ‘hacking’ noise came from the bathroom in the northwestern corner of Derek’s bedroom.

  “The hell’s goin’ on in there?” Eric asked curiously.

  “Ugh… I think Derek’s sick,” Kyle sighed.

  Another hacking noise, this one being louder than the first, sounded off behind the closed wooden bathroom door.

  “YA THINK???” Jim dumbly asked.

  Kyle glared at Jim as Sam said, “Aw… I sure hope that the poor guy’s okay.”

  A few seconds later, the sound of a toilet flushing filtered the airwaves as the bathroom door suddenly opened up.

  Stepping out of the bathroom wearing a fuzzy red robe was a very miserable looking Derek Bentley.

  Face pale and eyes bloodshot, the obviously sick nerd creeped out of the darkened bathroom like a decrepit ghoul.

  The others had expressions of shock on their faces as Derek said, “Guh-Guys, I don’t fuh-fuh-feel so guh-good.”

  “NO SHIT, BRAH. I can smell your BARF reeking from the bathroom! Ugh… GROSS!!!” Jim snarled in disgust.

  “JIM!” Kyle snapped at Jim, causing him to turn towards him fully.

  “What?” Jim shrugged. “Don’t you smell it too?”

  “Such a fuckin’ dumbass,” Eric muttered as Kyle just shook his head at the hapless Jim.

  “How are you feeling, Derek?” Sam asked the stuttering teen in a caring tone of voice.

  Pushing his glasses up the bridge of his reddened nose, Derek replied, “I’ve buh-buh-been buh-buh-buh-buh…”

  “Better?” Kyle asked.

  Derek nodded.

  “Yeah, you don’t look too ‘hot,’ man,” Kyle remarked. “You better lie down.”

  Derek then looked over at his bed and was surprised to see Sam laying in it.

  “Come on, Derek. I won’t ‘bite’. Heh, heh,” Sam playfully giggled

  The tomboy then started patting the open side of the bed to her right with her left hand, causing Derek to gulp nervously.

  “AH SHIT!” Jim cried out. “D-Bent’s about to get his Vee-Card FINALLY taken!!! HA-HA!”

  Glaring at Jim immediately, Sam flipped him off.

  As Jim snickered, Derek made his way over to his bed and sat down next to Sam’s right.

  Still wearing his red bathrobe, the stuttering nerd carefully flung his legs up on the bed mattress and tried to get comfortable.

  Sam, in turn, watched over him like ‘Mother Goose’.

  “Do you want me to get you anything, Derek?” the Tomboy asked.

  Derek shook his head.

  “Nuh-Nuh-No thanks.”

  Sam smiled.

  “Okay… But if you do need anything, just give me a holler… Alright?”

  Derek nodded whilst slightly grinning.

  “Ugh… GAG ME,” Jim groaned whilst rolling his head. “So, what’s the game plan for tonight, y’all?”

  “Well, Derek’s sicker than a dog so chances are lookin’ pretty slim, Jim,” Kyle answered.

  Eyes widened, Jim gritted, “ARE YOU FU… URGH… ALRIGHT! AL-FUCKIN’-RIGHT! You ASSHOLES win this round!”

  Lowering his brow now, the Dingus stewed, “Sorry if I sound like an asshole myself, but Derek’s the one who’s sick… NOT US.”

  “WOW, JIM. Selfish, much?” Sam asked whilst lying beside Derek.

  “Yeah. He is, actually,” Eric answered. “A MASSIVELY SELFISH PRICK, he is.”

  “HEY! I’m not tryin’ to be a dick, ight?!” Jim erupted in defense of himself. “Alls I’m trying to say is why can’t WE all go out to Josh’s Party tonight and leave Derek back here to get, y’know, better?”

  “You just don’t give up,” Kyle went on to ask. “Do you, Jimbo?”

  “Nope. Not really,” Jim replied. “NOT NOW! NOT EVER!!!”

  Narrowing his eyes at Jim, Eric spat, “Your parents should have given you up for adoption when you were born… OR ABORTED YOU.”

  “DAMN, E,” Kyle blared as shocked ‘gasps’ filled the airwaves.

  Eric shrugged his shoulders as Jim glared hatefully at him.

  “I’ll guh-guh-go,” Derek suddenly stuttered out of nowhere.

  Looking back over at his best friend in shock, Kyle asked, “HUH??? What’d you just say, Der?” Pressing his glasses back up the bridge of his reddened nose again, Derek stated, “I suh-suh-said

  that I’ll guh-go to Juh-Josh’s Puh-Puh-Party to… tonight.”

  Kyle now had a shocked look on his face now as did Sam and Eric.

  “FOR REALZ, FAM?!” Jim cried out with a gleeful look on his own face.

  “DAMMIT,” Eric growled.

  Sam then looked at the sickly geek and said, “DEREK, you do realize that you just opened up a whole nother ‘can of worms’, right?”

  Derek had an unsure look on his pale face as Kyle leaned forward in his chair to ask, “Are you sure about this, dude? Bein’ outside breathing in all that cold air tonight might make you sicker than you are now.”

  Thinking of the possibility of seeing his number one crush, Amber Swanson, there at Josh’s Party tonight, Derek nodded, “I… I wuh-wuh-wanna go.”

  Jim grinned like a madman.

  “THAT IT’S! THE DAMN DEAL HAS BEEN SEALED, MI AMIGOS!” Jim cheered joyously. “WE ARE GOIN’ TO A PAR-TAY!!!”

  “Damn you, Bentley… DAMN YOU,” Eric seared as he ran his palms down his face.

  “Ugh… Man. This is gonna be a LONG night,” Kyle sighed as Sam looked up at him.

  “Oh c’mon, Capitano Goobero,” Sam said. “It’s not gonna be all that bad. Look at the bright side.”

  “And what ‘bright side’ would that be, Sam?” Kyle asked.

  “Well… There’s gonna be sick jams ‘cause I heard Diego is spinnin’ the decks, free beer, and of course… ME.”

  Kyle’s eyes then widened as the tomboy continued to toy with his emotions

  Witnessing this from off to the side was Eric, who just rolled his eyes whilst sighing in disgust, “Ugh… God, just fuckin’ KILL ME already.”