The next morning, Dekka and I were getting breakfast from the guild kitchen. It really was a useful place. An inn dedicated to adventures.

  I was listening to two NPCs talk about the best way to deal with a goblin hoard when a stunning elf woman walked in.

  I had no idea that this game had elves. Though I had seen a few halflings around town, not counting Rory, so I am not sure why I was so surprised.

  Maybe it was because of how beautiful this character was, and her clothing was very game-coded. Flowing cloak, flowing skirt with slits all the way to the upper thigh, long flowing silver hair with a gleaming metal circlet holding it artfully out of the person’s face, and a perfect bare midriff and a top that looked like a bikini top that had been attacked by a bedazzler.

  Her slender hand with long, delicate, perfectly manicured fingernails gripped a long staff that matched the metal of the circlet and had a gem that not only floated in a cutout at the top, but also glowed faintly. I narrowed my eyes. The gem and they elf’s eyes were the same unreal fantasy purple.

  I overheard that this was Lady Ayerelia.

  I snorted. Of course it was.

  But now I was paying close attention. This had to be a player. No NPC would be this over the top unless they were supposed to be royalty. And this person was trying to make a party—not royal behaviour. A queen would have demanded attendance; there would be a quest to find her lost tiara or something just to prove you were worthy to accompany her on some epic journey or something. Not just casually show up to an adventurer’s guild.

  I wasn’t jealous. Not really. But if she has some sparkly mount parked outside, I might. Like if she had some caparisoned unicorn that was white as the driven snow, or an elk with ribbons and bells or gems hanging from its antlers, then I would be annoyed.

  I had to remind myself I had Dekka, and no amount of having to slog along on my own two legs was going to make me wish for a mount instead, if it was an either-or proposition.

  Standing up, I walked over to her.

  “Hi, my name is Elizabeth.”

  The elf looked down at me. She was very tall. “What do you want?”

  Ok rude. But I probably looked like a low-level NPC. “I hear you want to join a party. Did I overhear you are a healer?”

  “Yes, I am a level four druid.”

  I blinked. The outfit wasn’t giving druid, it was giving elf influencer at the club, but whatever. “I have a party, we have all the slots filled except a healer.”

  The elf’s purple gaze drifted to my eyes, looking at me with interest for the first time. “Are you a player? Why are you dressed like that?”

  “Yes, I am a player. Kinda. These are just the clothes I got when I started.” I looked down at myself. They looked exceptionally terrible in light of Ms Ayerelia’s shimmery fabrics. Which were spotless, I now noted.

  “I didn’t know they had released an NPC skin. How did you get it? It looks terrible, but I do try to collect all the fits possible in a game.”

  I blinked. This person was not like me. They weren’t trapped. This was just a game for them. I assumed they could leave.

  My mind was spinning. I had finally met another real person, and I was at a loss for what to say. How did I explain my situation? Also did that mean the real me was attached to some VR equipment somewhere? Could I wake up, and exit this game?

  “This is just the equipment I got at the tutorial,” I said with a shrug after a long pause.

  The elf looked very skeptical but let it drop. “Who do you have for your party?”

  I looked blank.

  “Just invite me to your party and I will check it out.”

  I went to my party screen, and when I clicked invite, it pulled up [Ayerelia] and gave me the option to invite, so I did. Turns out she was a healer.

  “Oh, hey, some of these NPCs aren’t bad.” She was flicking through her HUD with a pale finger.

  “I could join you. I have about two hours. We should be able to get through the dungeon in that time.”

  That made it clear this person could leave the game. But now? I wasn’t ready. My leather breastplate wouldn’t be ready till later in the day.

  “Are you around later? I am picking up armour in a few hours.” I said, not wanting to be too direct.

  “Sorry, no, I am not likely going to get time to get back on till tomorrow.” Ayerelia made a moue of disappointment. “Well, I can get my own team.” She was about to leave.

  “No, no, it’s ok. We can go now. I just wanted to test it out.”

  The elf brightened. “Wonderful!” she said.

  “Um, this is my first dungeon raid. Do you know how to call your party members?”

  The elf looked me up and down. With a facial expression that asked if I was for real. When I continued to look earnestly up at her, she sighed.

  “In your party chat, click Start Quest.”

  I did that. And within a minute, the whole party was gathered around us.

  I also had to ask where the dungeon was. Thankfully, all the NPCs knew where it was.

  It was a short walk down a well-maintained road, straight to the dungeon entrance. And yes, Miss Fancy Pants Elf walked herself. No mount. That did make me feel a bit less resentful of her sparkliness.

  We stood before the dungeon entrance. It was a high arch carved into the side of a large hill. There were pillars of a lighter grey rock holding up the high ceiling of a shallow vestibule in the earth where a pair of thick wooden doors stood.

  The whole walk, I had wanted to say, ‘So hey, I am a person, but I am not a player like you. I am actually trapped here and I need your help.’ The longer we walked, the more awkward it seemed to bring up. Now here we were, and I was afraid that if I waited too long, we would be fighting. I was going to speak up, but Ayerelia walked up to the doors and swung them open.

  So much for healers staying at the back.

  “Let’s go, we can’t save once we are in. I don’t want to get to the end and have to leave and abandon the run.”

  The party filed in, and I was forced to follow, scowling at the idea she could save.

  “I have something to tell you, and I know it will sound odd,” I said to Ayerelia, stopping at the door she was holding open. “I’m not a player like you. I am stuck in the game.”

  A look of displeasure pinched the avatar’s fine features.

  “Look, I don’t know what your deal is, your immersion or whatever. But let’s just do this and part ways. I need to level up before the first world event, and grinding in this game is too hard.”

  “No, really, I-” But she was already striding into the dark depths.

  How could I convince her?

  “No, really, I am stuck. I can’t log out.” I chased after the tall figure.

  “I don’t know why they let kids into a beta.” She snapped. “Look, I just want to do this dungeon. If you are going to be weird, I am going to log out and then you will have no healer.”

  She stopped and stared me down. I guess my boosted charisma stat didn’t work on other players. I wanted to point out my dog and the weird clothes. But I get it. If someone said they were stuck in a game, I would be more likely to believe they were some young kid being a jerk than telling the truth. When I said nothing further, she nodded.

  “If you’re a player, great, you’re weird, but whatever. If you’re an NPC, you’re the most annoying AI I’ve met today. Either way, let’s move.”

  Not having a rebuttal for that, I just shut my mouth and followed down a set of wide spiral stairs lit with torches every quarter turn.

  The stone corridor reeked of mildew, old fur, and something sharp that made my eyes water. Was that ammonia?

  The party was just making it to the first landing, with Ayerelia still on the stairs, when Dekka, who had been running ahead, growled, a low, throaty warning that echoed in the darkness ahead.

  We stopped. And for a moment, everything was quiet. Then I heard skittering in the dark— many nails tapping against the stones. I raised my club and took the lead. My fingers are constantly adjusting, trying to get the perfect grip. Dekka was standing there growling just at the edge of the flickering light.

  The first creature launched itself out of the gloom at me. I yelped, swinging the club on instinct and catching it with a satisfying thwack despite not having used a skill.

  The creature was stopped but not knocked back.

  “RATS!” Bram yelled, coming up beside me and swinging his sword in a tight arc to keep the rat back.

  Fuck! Had he said rats, plural?

  Surely not. That single rat was huge! Larger than the rabbits had been. This game really liked rodents of unusual size.

  I saw a moment in the shadows behind this one.

  Shit.

  Rory was already gone, melting into shadow. “I’ll get the big one in the back,” he called, his voice refusing to echo and vanishing as he did.

  Ayerelia, for all her elf influencer appearance, lifted her glowing staff and sent up a ball of light [Illuminate], and the area was lit as if by magical fluorescent overhead lighting. Too bright, flickery and casts harsh shadows at the edges. I was interested in the notification that happened, but I was too shocked by the size and number of foes.

  Dekka lunged, tail wagging. German Shepherd-sized rats were something she had only dreamt of. I wondered if I should have warned them about what Dekka could do before we got into battle.

  Dekka charged in, eyes focused on the fastest moving one that was running from the back, ignoring the rest. I think Ayerelia started to yell something about calling my dog when she stopped. She stopped because Dekka had shifted, the shadows gathering around her until she was her death, wielding hellhound.

  I heard her say “oh” in a surprised manner behind me. Maybe now she would believe me, I wasn’t in the game the same way she was?

  Kevin, caught mid-spell, yelled, “Oh gods—what is that?” His spell misfired, and a tiny, panicked spark that I assume was supposed to spring forward from his wand just fell limply down and set his own trouser cuff smouldering.

  “That’s still my dog!” I tried to reassure everyone without taking my eyes off the rat right in front of me. “She just does that sometimes.”

  Dekka was grappling with a rat. Both were biting and not letting go. They were rolling around the stone floor, making terrible sounds.

  “I’m just glad that it is on our side,” Bram said and stepped forward to engage the rat.

  And then it was chaos.

  I just aimed at anything that seemed like a rat and not a fellow party member. It is harder than you might think.

  One was charging me; I had just dodged one and tripped over a tail. I got my bat up in time and used CRIPPLING HIT. The rat stopped, stunned. Rory reappeared behind me, dagger flashing. “Left side, boss!” He said as he slid around me to dash in to stab the rat between its ribs.

  It squealed and fell over. Bram turned and, in a smooth movement, decapitated it and then spun away facing another.

  15XP! CONGRATULATIONS, YOU HAVE LEVELLED UP +2 to strength, +2 to speed and +1 to constitution.

  You have an unspent skill point. Would you like to allocate it now? Y/N

  Not now, you stupid fucking game! I blinked rapidly

  Dekka ran past me, blood sliding off her hellhound hide. Not hers.

  I saw Kevin had been bitten. A couple of rats had him pressed up against the wall, and Ayerelia—still spotless—sighed and spun her staff, sending a ripple of green through the air.

  “[REGENERATION] Everyone, try not to die, please. The cool down on this is a bitch.”

  The spell hit me like a cold splash; my latest scratch stopped bleeding. But Kevin’s laceration stopped bleeding, and he managed to stand upright.

  1.5XP! Good Dekka must have taken care of one.

  I blinked my vision clear and found Kevin. He looked scared. I ran in and used SWING. It felt like my arms lengthened as I swung, that is the only way I can describe it. The arc my club made was wider than should be possible.

  SWING, it seemed, was a bit of an area of effect skill. It hit both the rats that were about to attack Kevin. My blow stopped them.

  That was good. For Kevin.

  The two rats swung around in perfect precision, their large scaly tails nearly knocking me off my feet. I was glad my speed stat had improved. I could now jump and flail my club at the same time with reasonable success with both.

  Now that the rats were not staring at him like he was about to be dinner, Kevin managed an energy bolt that absolutely fried the rat on my left.

  15XP!

  It stank something awful, but I was glad to be facing one less. And it was nice to know we were all getting XP for each kill.

  Not seeming to notice the death of its friend, the other rat lunged at me—its long, needle-like teeth spread wide, emitting a piercing murine shriek.

  I started to feel it, the rush. The fire. The anger. That hurt my ears! Standing still, I focused, and right as it got within range, I swung downward on its head with HIT. Its skull cracked like a nut between my club and the hard floor. Part of me was sickened by the way one of its eyes burst. But mostly I just felt elated by the kill.

  WTF was wrong with me?

  15XP!

  I heard Bram yell. This was not the time for introspection. This was the time for bashing.

  Bram had run over to block the rats from approaching Ayerelia, and now there were three facing him. No, two I saw now, one had just died but was still twitching. I glanced at the melee to see where I would be most useful. I couldn’t see Rory, but that was a good sign. Kevin was standing by Dekka. Her fearsome form keeping the rats back for the moment. Four large rat bodies were motionless on the floor, and there were at least four more left.

  Light flashed behind me, so bright it felt as if the shadows were burned into my retina. [PURIFYING LIGHT]

  15XP!

  Ayerelia must have a combat skill, nice! She and Bram were likely ok. I decided to take on one of the rats skulking at the edge of the shadow. How fast would my speed let me go? I sprinted straight for it.

  And tripped. I had assumed the floor was a flat, even surface—it wasn’t. There were some cracks that zigged and zagged their way across, now that I was noticing. I was about to fly into that rat, and I wasn’t poised to use my club. Damn. Then I had a moment of inspiration.

  As the rat swung around to face me, I pushed my hand that had been stretched out to catch myself down on its muzzle and propelled myself upwards in a sort leap leapfrogging motion. I landed astride the rat. Only I was facing backwards.

  This confused the rat. Its screams seemed tinged with fear, and it tried to spin to bite me. I dug my heels into the back of its skull on either side, right below its ears. The rat, now prevented from turning its head, decided to bolt to its compadres for help.

  I should start carrying a dagger. Something stabby would be very handy right now.

  1.5 XP!

  “Best Dog!” I yelled out in praise as I gripped the bucking rat’s greasy fur.

  I saw her run up beside me, glowing eyes watching me to see what this new game was. The rat shied away from the hellhound, and I was almost unseated. Then the rat stopped dead, and since I had been bracing to not fall forward, I ended up flying off behind me over its head.

  And knocking Rory over.

  15XP!

  One of Rory’s daggers was sticking out of the rat’s chest. I quickly stood and felt more than saw a rat coming up behind me. Spin, HIT. The rat staggered back. Zap! A bolt flew from Kevin’s staff.

  15XP!

  Rory staggered to his feet. Was it my impact that had hurt him, or was he already injured? But Ayerelia cast [Regeneration] and lunged forward smoothly to retrieve his dagger from the heart of the rat.

  I heard a shing of metal and a wet gurgling scream.

  15XP!

  And then there was silence, save our panting breaths. I looked around at the carnage. Nine massive dead rats lay in their own pools of blood. The overhead light of Ayerelia’s light began to fade.

  That was what passed for a warm-up fight in this dungeon?

  I think we were in over our heads.