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Lesson 6: How the hell are you supposed to defend yourself against this? pt1

  Her birthday had come and gone, and the gray reality of everyday life had slowly crept back into Alice’s world. But some things had changed. A few days after that unforgettable day, a delivery man knocked on the door of the forest house. He handed Alice a laptop, a wireless internet contract, and a cell phone. From that moment on, she began to explore the virtual world—tentatively at first, but steadily. If it hadn’t been for her IT class at school, she wouldn’t have even known how to turn any of it on. Still, through trial and error, she learned to surf the web—and with that, how to find the information she needed to keep progressing.

  There was a lot to take in. The world suddenly seemed like an entirely unfamiliar place. So many things she had no clue about, so much she needed to absorb… It made her head spin. Caught up in this new madness, she quickly forgot her daily training. Trends, news, novelties—everything blurred together. But with each passing day, her internal filter grew sharper. She started with fashion tutorials. It didn’t take her long to figure out how to order things online and pay for them using a bank account she’d set up under her aunt’s name. In the first few months, she was completely swept up in the thrill of shopping. But once she realized how quickly her money was disappearing, she reined herself in and began approaching her purchases more rationally.

  Next came makeup, hairstyling, a bit of etiquette. It wasn’t a random choice—she had her reasons. Every night, as she lay down to sleep, the image of the Not-a-Doctor would come to mind. The way people looked at him, the pride she’d felt standing beside him, the aura that surrounded him. It was intoxicating—but also tinged with something else. Shame. She wasn’t good enough to stand on equal ground with the Not-a-Doctor. But she knew she could change that. And she wasn’t afraid of the work it would take. The first changes came quickly. She noticed people watching her more intently—strangers’ glances lingering, even her peers offering a kind of childish, tentative respect. She liked it, but she also knew it was skin-deep.

  She started thinking more, questioning things she didn’t yet know how to put into words. Her focus soon shifted to esotericism and spiritual development. Meditation, exercises, self-improvement techniques. She soaked it all in—from Reiki to occult practices, myths, legends, conspiracy theories. So much to learn, so little time! But she didn’t give up. She realized that managing her time better was key. Her intuition screamed—begged—for her to return to her training. If not for that, she might have completely forgotten the Not-a-Doctor’s instructions. Nightmares finally forced her to carve out thirty minutes a day for meditation. For now, that had to be enough.

  A year passed. Then another. Her adolescence seemed to be coming to an end—or at least, that’s how Alice felt. The acne began to fade, her body was changing, her figure growing more feminine with each passing day. Even her voice was different—calmer now, softer, more mature. Her worldview shifted, too. Her understanding of the world expanded daily. The range of topics she could speak about confidently was growing fast. But one area—once her highest priority—began to fall behind. What had once been essential became secondary. Still, Alice didn’t have the courage to abandon it entirely. She had to grow spiritually. She had to follow instructions. The memory of that windy day in the woods was still far too vivid to let her rebel—or give in to carelessness. But no new impulse came to reignite her motivation. The Not-a-Doctor stayed silent. Occasionally, he appeared in her dreams issuing brief commands, tossing out curt remarks, but with each passing month, his presence faded. In her mind, though, it was a different story. There, he appeared every evening, the moment she turned off the light and pulled the blanket over herself. She hated herself for it. Hated herself even more when she realized… he probably knew. After all, he never showed up in her dreams on the nights she dreamed of him.

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  Even though she didn’t practice much, her skills didn’t fade. In fact, they were developing slowly but surely. Moving small objects around her became easier and easier. She was also getting better at tuning in to the energy of her surroundings and sensing even the tiniest shifts within it. It didn’t happen often, but there were days when she could see other people’s auras, their colors, their disturbances. And she quickly realized how incredibly useful that was. She could tell if someone was sick, sometimes even what was wrong with them, or what they were thinking about. It helped her understand herself better too—comparing her own life to the lives of others. One day, she even had the idea to test her abilities by working with other people’s energy. It drained her horribly, but… it worked. That’s how she discovered that subtle suggestions could be planted without any psychological tricks. She also realized that doing so depleted her own energy—and that came at a cost. Meditation helped lessen the strain, but it couldn’t completely restore what was lost.

  Because nothing is ever perfect in a world full of flawed beings.

  She was sixteen and just beginning summer break when the long-awaited message from the Not-a-Doctor finally arrived. He hadn’t appeared in her dreams. He hadn’t shown up in person. But the second she saw the envelope with her name on it, she knew. Her hands shook, her heart pounded as she opened it. Was it fear? Or excitement? It didn’t matter—not in that moment. She didn’t want to think about it. Instead, she tore the envelope open and pulled out the invitation with something like reverence.

  It was an invitation to a guesthouse in the countryside. She didn’t recognize the name of the town, but her gut told her it wasn’t anywhere near home. It also whispered a warning—but who had time to listen to whispers? She bolted to her room, grabbed the suitcase she’d kept ready for years for just such an occasion, and started tossing everything inside that she thought she might need.

  “Alice, do you really think this is a message from your guardian?” Helena asked, her voice full of doubt. “What if it’s some kind of mistake?”

  “It’s not a mistake, Helena,” Alice said, flustered, flipping through her cosmetics in a frenzy. “I know it’s from him.”

  Why the hell am I so happy? she thought.

  “You’re only sixteen. You shouldn’t go off so far on your own. Valery says it’s a long trip.”

  “Oh, please, I’m not a child anymore,” she snapped, as more things found their way into the already overstuffed suitcase. “I can handle myself.”

  “Well, yes… but, Alice, the world is dangerous. What if a criminal attacks you? Or someone robs you? Or, God forbid, kills you?”

  Alice froze. She looked hard at the older woman. Her face was unreadable, like a mask—but her eyes gave away a flicker of anger bubbling beneath the surface.

  “You’re joking, right?” Alice asked quietly. “Me? Get killed? You really think anyone could touch me with him watching?”

  Helena sighed. She realized Alice was right. If anyone in this world could claim they were safe—it was her. The Not-a-Doctor wasn’t exactly the picture of kindness, but that only proved further that no one in their right mind would mess with what he considered his.

  After a moment of silence, Helena said at last, resigned,

  “All right. But be careful anyway. You don’t want to owe him anything.”

  “I know that very well, believe me,” Alice growled, zipping up her bag.

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