I walked through the door almost a week later, finally well enough to move again.

  The bell wheezed in greeting - I patted the doorjamb back.

  “You’re late,” Vaarg grumbled from behind his clipboard.

  “You’re early,” I quipped back.

  “Got something different for you today,” he continued around his mug of goo.

  I raised an eyebrow.

  He pushed a package across the counter.

  It wasn’t very big, small enough for me to carry comfortably.

  Except every square inch of it was stamped with “Cursed”, “Dangerous”, and “Possibly Explosive.”

  There was even a “RUN AWAY!” In there somewhere.

  I paled a bit.

  Vaarg smiled.

  “Beeg! Oh Beeg!” Stupid shrieked, careening around the corner.

  “You eez better!” She looked up at me with tear filled eyes before flinging herself at me in what I think was meant to be a hug but felt more like being hit by a sack of hyperactive squirrels.

  She smelled like cinnamon, ink, and something faintly electrical.

  Probably more Stupid-brand gibberish magic. I wouldn’t say that out loud, though.

  It was terrifyingly efficient.

  And had always ended up helping me.

  Well - almost always.

  “I saved you a toenail!” she declared, shoving a jar into my hand.

  It was, indeed, a toenail.

  “Why,” I said flatly.

  “In case you died! Memory jar!” she grinned.

  I set it on the counter without comment. It twitched once, then stilled.

  Vaarg didn’t even look up. “That better not be from the hydra in Aisle Nine again. We’re still paying off the cleanup crew.”

  “Not hydra,” Stupid said proudly. “From Beeg!”

  My hand immediately went to my boots.

  One of them did feel a bit breezier than usual.

  I narrowed my eyes. “You cut my toenail while I was sick?”

  “No Beeg! I took the whole thing!” she beamed.

  My brain broke a bit. Short circuited a moment.

  Until Vaarg sighed.

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  “Forget the toenail, Beeg. It will grow back. You have a delivery to make.”

  That wasn’t the point!

  He pointed at the package, which had started faintly humming at some point.

  “Where to?” I asked resignedly.

  He handed me a slip of parchment.

  I read it.

  Then read it again.

  “Is this… in Uptown?”

  He raised an eyebrow, “is that a problem?”

  I looked at the package, then back at Vaarg.

  “It’s…cursed? And a lot of other…things?”

  “You would be surprised who our highest paying patrons are,” Vaarg answered.

  Stupid leaned in, whispering loudly, “Eez safe. Probably. Might sing a little.”

  I looked at the package.

  “It’s humming,” I replied.

  “It singz quietly,” she nodded.

  “Take It with you - he knows the way.”

  Stupid deflated like a puddle of goblin goo, slinking away down an aisle in sadness at being left behind.

  I slumped and took the package.

  It appeared quietly beside me.

  “Morning Beeg,” he monotoned.

  “Morning” I grunted back, holding the package like a bomb.

  “Put it in here, the guard will have a field day if they see it like that,” It continued, presenting me with a box.

  I gingerly put the cursed …something inside.

  It turned and walked out the door.

  I followed.

  The bell wheezed in farewell.

  ——

  It and I slowly wound our way through the non-human sector.

  Neither was really our choice.

  The slow or the winding, that is.

  The sun was shining happily, which meant the streets were exploding with activity.

  Vendors were everywhere.

  Kips, cubs and kids played on every corner and lamppost.

  Which reminded me it was Saturday…so no school.

  Too bad.

  A kid kicked a ball, which then bounced off the side of my head.

  I mumbled under my breath.

  As for the winding - the entire sector felt like a child had drawn the city layout. Not one street continued straight for more than 50 paces, and the buildings curved in fantastical ways to accommodate it.

  The runed-glass in the cobblestones glowed a slight gold today, giving off the light from the sun.

  They would change to blue tonight, once the lampposts went to work.

  It was chaos. Not that I had seen much to compare it too, but my small village when I was a child had been a fairly orderly human settlement.

  I don’t know how It managed to do it, but if monotone was a walk - he was doing it.

  Shuffling forward next to me, eyes forward and slightly down, never deviating from his spot next to me - which seemed to be exactly one foot to my right.

  Seriously.

  Even when I moved to avoid carts, he moved unerringly next to me.

  It would be creepy - if it wasn’t It.

  Honestly? It was just the way he was.

  Which is why it surprised me when he stopped abruptly, forcing me to backtrack.

  The bustle around us had died down.

  Before us hung a sign, on the last crooked building before the street and buildings straightened out.

  Human Quarter.

  We exchanged a glance.

  “We cut through here to get to uptown,” It said in his monotone. Somehow his expressionless voice weighed heavy with dread.

  I gulped, looking forward at the streets that seemed all too clean.

  And all the humans, several of whom were already glancing over at us - as if daring us to keep going.

  We stepped forward in tandem onto the uniform grey cobblestone.