I finish walking down the stairs, there a ringing in my ears that still hurts. The brat riding over my shoulder is the cause. She suppose to be ten, if Albert is to be believed but looks like she is eight. Don't matter Boss wanted her at the far cell, thinks she been upsetting the other merchandise. I agree, anytime I walk down here I start feeling like everything a mistake.
Well new home for ya, brat, away from everything, I wish the isolation would snap your soul but Frank heavy handed commands seems to have beaten us to it. Seems to manage to eat and shit in the corner just fine though.
Boss got a theory. Think she is playing us for fools. He asked me to give her a little scare. I asked how intact she needed to be, Boss felt best not to risk breaking anything inside the little shit. I swear you break one piece of merchandise, still was sellable just couldn't get anymore level in ‘em.
Laid the brat against the wall. Turn my back to ‘em, gotta make a good show of it now, I remove my knife. I turn to give my best pants shitting sneer, the better to scare the faker.
“You ain't merchandise anymore, a few less fingers to pay back for my ears should do it.”
I leer over her, kneel and pick up her hand. Her breathing is getting quicker, little miss faker indeed. Amazingly, she hasn't begged me to stop yet. Pinkies are the easiest to stop bleeding, so best to start there. As I almost get my knife to my task, her eyes are staring into mine.
Then I'm nothing, I'm on my ass, fallen backwards. I got to get away. My hands are clenched. I scuttle backwards, my back runs into the cell door, I don't feel it. I can't get any further away. She staring at me, just like every other child I helped sell. Hollow eyes. They all are staring at me. I got enough to pay for a night of drinks. They all look like my little brother. They all are my older sister. I can't breath. It's not worth it. She still staring. It’s not worth it. I start saying it now, it’s not worth it. The knife still in my clenched hand. I am empty, I stab myself to feel anything. It works, I felt it, but it's leaving me already. It's not worth it. I keep stabbing to chase any feeling. I don't feel anything. It's not worth it.
-----
You have gained [Mental Mana Sight] Basic 4
Gain 2 exp
Soul raised to 75
This is a daily reminder: You have 2 unallocated stat points
I wake up with a pinch in my left eye. I'm breathing heavily now. Mom and Grandma were wrong about why my [Speak:Common] was going up when I was in the abyss. It was Vance's conversations that were playing non stop. Before [Mental Mana Sight] that's all it was, random snippets of a sad despicable man’s conversations. The night I gained the sight was the night I was the man. He stayed at the keep and was responsible for maintaining the cells. It wasn't till last night that I entered his life. To see myself from the position of my jailer was so jarring. The worst is his thoughts, his suspicions, his dehumanization, I am him at those points and shudder now. Six months of this, to go though forty-seven years of this man's life. My soul grew by four because of whatever this is. Souls are memories. Is this only the beginning? Am I still me?
Marie enters the room, I pull my aura in before she gets to me. I can feel the aura strain against my defense. Anymore soul and I won’t be able to hold my aura in anymore. Any strong emotion could tip me over. I need more mental fortitude. I face Marie.
“Good morning, Marie”
“Good morning, young miss, the purple dot has come back and looks larger.”
It's the same every morning, mom thinks I'm generating mind mana when I sleep. Probably what's facilitating the memories. If I started trying to expand my new core would my eye always be on?
-----
I'm laying across from my mom, she had laid me back down after her hug. I can barely move but I can talk. I ask her about my changes.
“Why did my arcane core become a mental one.”
“Thats just the process, create an arcane core, develop it until it gains an aspect.”
“Okay but why mental, I feel the system is trying to mock me.”
“Well it's generally based on the highest element type skill the individual has, that you are so below a usual core creator skill wise, mother and I weren't sure what you would end up with.”
“So my [Resist Mental Attack] caused my core to be mental then.”
“No, that's incorrect, that skill isn't the manipulation of mental energies but the rejection of it.”
“Then what?”
She looks at me with a sad smile, “The one skill you have that manipulates mental energies is your [Pariah Aura Manipulation].
I shudder at that.
“O your purple dot just winked out”
“Did you just say winked out about my eye”
She smiles, I giggle at my own dumb observation.
“I don't really want to use mental magic.”
This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.
Being on the receiving end of so many dominate mind spells has made me want to swear off the whole endeavor.
“Mental magic isn't all compels, there are also illusion and mind healing magics. Also defending against mind attacks is easier with mental mana”
She saw through me.
“So how far are you from making a core and what type will it be?”
“O well, I should reach the minimum requirements in another three soul levels” then in a smaller voice “and its most likely be a life core.”
She seems embarrassed by this, her arms are crossed over her chest. I asked her why and she wouldn't tell me.
-----
Seated for breakfast again. Marie in the kitchen, it's best to bring this up now.
“My soul grew by four this morning.”
“Do you know what has caused this?”
I squirm. “I'd rather not say. I feel I'm at my limit for holding in my aura.”
“Sara.” Mom already mastered that tone that makes your name a demand for explanation.
Marie comes in with our meal. After placing our meals, grandmother tells her to attend to other duties until summoned. When Marie has left she turns to me.
“Sara, as much as I would like to respect your privacy, you don't know enough about the system to determine whether we should be concerned or not.”
They have done so much for me, I don't want to lose that. Telling them scares me. Admitting it feels like admitting I'm a monster. The aura within me grows denser within.
You have gained [Resist Mental Attacks] Intermediate 2
Men raised to 39
Mom's hand touches mine from across the table, she is smiling but her eyes show concern. I begin.
“Since I gained my new sight skill, my dreams have been of the life of the first guard I killed.”
“That man killed himself.” My mother is trying to make me not feel responsible .
I am though, ”My aura drove him to it, last night was the end of his life.”
There is silence in the room for a bit, then grandmother asks a question.
“And you went through his life in a week?”
“I'm quite certain I was hearing pieces of conversations he's been having since the day he died. So six months for forty-seven years”
“And you believe that your aura may be the cause.”
I nod my head at this.
“I know this is a very hard question to ask, but it may help determine how long this takes and whether you need to be deliberate with your aura. Get as calm as you can” Grandmother intones.
My mother squeezes my hand, I've trust them this far. I find as much calm as I can, my heart still flutters, I take a deep breath.
“I'm ready” as I can be.
“From the reports, your father died in front of you, inside your aura. Did you receive exp, and have you heard any of his memories?”
My heart clenches as does my aura, my mother is around the table and giving me a hug. The emotions are hard, but I steady in time. It's a long moment before I speak.
“No, to both questions.”
I'm not sure if I wish I had gotten the memories or should be grateful that I hadn't. My tears have stopped watering my mom's shoulder. Silent tears, bitter. I push her away.
“Thanks, mom”
“Well that at least tells us it's not just those who die inside your aura.” My eyes water, grandma patting my hand, “sorry dear, is there any other insight you can add?”
“There are three more lives that defiantly were forced to suicide by my aura, a fourth did die close enough to me that I recieved the exp for it. He was the last.”
Fucked up system that exp is absorbed by the closest individual, its how those slavers could sell those children for exp. Want your five year old to not be burdened with murder of another? Just shoot an arrow into another kid that is standing next to them.
“So possibly a year and a half before we have more knowledge.” Mother sounded worried.
“Not necessarily, it's possible the absorption of memories could fade in time or grow faster as Sara intelligence grows.”
Reach advanced in an int skill or my combined [Common] skill. I shudder at the thought of living lifetimes in days, I feel stretched as is.
“Planning for determining how this works will need to wait until Sara has finished processing the memories she already holds. It is paramount that Sara avoid gaining any exp from slaying till then.”
“Grandmother, I'm not planning on killing anyone again.”
She gives me a sad smile, “I know dear, life sometimes takes that choice from us, as you well know. I meant the slaying of monsters as well. They might have rudimentary memories but it's possible they could impart themselves on you all the same.”
“Right, wouldn't want to slay a rat warren and have years of memories full of wanting cheese."
“How is that different from now? I saw you staring at our larder's cheese wheels.”
“Mother!” I give my best pout.
We eat for a bit thinking through the conversation. I broached that I still don't have a decent way to get mental fortitude to keep ahead of my soul gains.
“As much as raising your resistances would delight Marie, you're already beyond the easy tier one skill stat gains.”
“I've not heard of tier referring to skills before.”
“You have a few skills higher than tier one, your [Status Screen] is a tier two skill. [Common] will be tier three. The easiest way to tell is by the amount of stats you would receive from the skill.”
Ah, “so is there a tier two mental fortitude skill I could get?”
“Your not going to like the answer to this, honey”
I raise my eyebrow.
Grandmother is the one who breaks the bad news, “After you gain the skill [Mana Manipulation:External], you could gain [Convert Arcane to Mental Mana], then you could charge your core which would provide skill levels. Once you fill it though you would need a way of spending that mana to make room for more.”
Which means casting mental magic. I'm pinching the bridge of my nose. Grandma smirks at that, then throws me a lifeline.
“Are you opposed to compelling golems?”
-----
“I think for our last hour we can spend time instructing you on the use of golems.”
Marie really is a sadist, she had fetched a box and sat it near my bed before going over writing lessons. Three hours of me making glances at the box. Three excruciating hours in which she zapped me for every distraction. I gained two levels to [Resist Lightning]. She brings the box over and opens the lid, I peer into the box and see four rods and rather distressing, a rat skeleton.
“This isn't going to be necromancy is it?
Marie tilts her head, “I do not know that word, young miss.”
“Magic that returns life to the dead and they generally have a hatred of the living?”
“You speak of the undead.”
“I guess?"
“There are two ways to animate a corpse, you can use golem runes to simulate nerve control and be able to provide commands or you could bind a soul to the corpse and that soul would move it. I believe the second option would result in your ‘hatred of the living’ and is generally considered taboo. This skeleton has been augmented with golem runes and is an example of the first option and is acceptable in society, though most would prefer to steer clear of using sapient species skeletons.”
“But why skeletons in the first place, it sounds as if a construct could be anything?”
“The skeleton is already in a form that is proportioned properly for motion, creating something from scratch at this size and functionality would be cost prohibitive.”
So okay using souls is bad, wiring a skeleton with motors is fine.
“This rod will move the golem forward, it is a set distance, simply tap like so.”
She demonstrates and the rat moves one kings feet forward.
“Multiple taps will make it move that many times further.”
Another demonstration, simple enough.
“Does it matter where I tap it?”
“No”
“If the golem runs into a rod is that considered a tap?”
“I'm not sure, young miss, are you planning something?”
“Just a thought, please tell me what these other rods do.”
