The omelet was the best Damian had ever had, dragon eggs had this natural spiciness to them that hits just right. Subtle yet builds as you continue, stuffed with dragon sausage, regular bacon, chives and cheese melted over top. Damian dug in and savored his vengeance. Damian finally had an answer for the question what does vengeance taste like. He’s never been asked that question before and likely never would, but he had an answer now. Damian and Arushi lavished praise on Viktor, who just bashfully rubbed the back of his neck.
Disposing of the waste Damian helped Arushi to stand. Letting Arushi walk, would turn a week of travel into at least two, so Damian decided to have Viktor tie her to his back. Arushi tried to protest but Viktor just gave her a mischievous grin and simply pushed her onto Damian’s back. Unable to push herself off while Viktor looped the rope around their midsection Arushi just harumphed and let it happen. She only protested again, when Viktor wrapped her legs around Damian’s waist and tied them together to lock her in place.
“It’s improper and embarrassing! Can’t we try doing this another way?” Arushi asked hopefully.
“No, this is fastest vay. It vill allow Damian to keep pace vith me, I vill do same vith princess.” Viktor rejected.
“Wait, what?” The princess asked, only to find herself tied to Viktor’s broad back moments later.
Damian chuckled, “Alright let’s set off. I’m ready to be done with this bullshit quest.”
“Vhat route should ve take back? Going back the vay ve came is too dangerous. You are down arm, and Arushi can’t move vell.” Viktor pointed out.
“Hm, good point.” Damian pulled the map from his inventory and handed it to Viktor. “Can you spread this open for me please?”
Viktor complied and Damian spent some time to study the map. He found a few viable routes, but selected one that would take them a week and a half to reach their destination. The route was safer and patrolled actively by kingdom soldiers, so with luck, they could pass the princess to the first patrol they saw and end this miserable scenario. Viktor and Arushi didn’t have any objections to the plan; the princess had a lot but was ignored. Emerging into the light, after being in a dingy cave, was a wonderful feeling. Damian took in the valley that would be forever etched in his memories. The cheerful sunlight, and pleasant breeze cooling his face seemed slightly mocking yet soothing at the same time. The group basked in it for a few seconds, then Damian and Viktor took off at a jog.
It took four days to come across their first patrol. The journey was boring without the threat of death at every turn. The group spent most of their journey amusing or embarrassing stories from before the integration and playing simple travel games to pass the time. Viktor got really intense during I-spy, the man played to win, it was just a shame he was so bad at it. The man could not keep his colors straight when it came to slight variations in shades.
They were honestly running out of things to talk about when the patrol came into sight. The group sped up and skidded to a halt just short of the, now spooked, platoon of soldiers. Their commander, a tall man with a smooth-shaven face, and a smile that begged to be punched, stepped forward.
Viktor was busy untying his ropes, so Damian answered. “Returning you princess. The dragon is dead, and we are leaving.”
The princess, hair disheveled and clothes stained from days of travel by Viktor-back, stumbled towards the soldiers when her feet hit the ground. The soldiers sprang into action, forming up around the princess, while one of their number took off, likely to the nearest garrison to pass the news along.
The commander gave a crisp, short bow to the group, “Thank you sirrah, you may call me Sir Erwin. The safe return of our princess is joyous event. Is there any way I can convince you to journey back with us? The king will reward you greatly for the return of his daughter.”
Damian waved to his stump, “No, I need to see what I can do about this. Safe travels.”
The princess got in one last parting shot by flipping Damian the bird, which he returned in kind. The soldiers bristled, but when the first bolt landed at Sir Erwin’s feet, they were quick to back off. With that the world zoomed out and the gentle soothing tones, of the monk began the ending narration.
Sir Erwin, swiftly returned the princess to her father, and the kingdom rejoiced. The dragon was dead, they no longer had to worry about it razing their homes to the ground, or snacking on their loved ones. The king, so moved by the trio’s heroics had a statue commissioned in their honor. Sir Viktor, proud and friendly, Lady Arushi, calm and sophisticated, and Sir Damian with his companion animal Bronze, serious and intense. Their tale faded into legend, inspiring many a child’s imagination as their parents would tell them the story before bed. Our trio made their way back home, battered and less whole than they had once been, but victorious. What is in store for our heroes next? Will Viktor be forced to contend with more spiders? Will Arushi be forced to reveal she recovered on day two and didn’t want to walk? Will Damian find a way to restore his arm, or will he build a new one? Stay tuned to find out!
They appeared in the familiar void of the system’s evaluation space. Damian turned to Arushi who was still tied to his back.
“Really?” He asked with a deadpan.
She had the decency to look embarrassed. “It was a rather long journey and your back was comfy. I will apologize for not speaking up sooner.”
Damian snorted in amusement, Arushi broke into giggles, and Viktor let out loud guffaws. When they got themselves back under control, the system started calculating their rewards.
Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.
“Can we pass that reward up for the promise of no more spiders?” The shudder in Viktor’s voice was tangible.
“Aw, that’s sweet of her, I hope she and Leshy had a wonderful anniversary!” Arushi cooed.
They each gained a total of 14,708 essence, rounded down to remove the remainder. With his previous 9000 Damian now had 23,708 essence! He would hold on to it for now to see what he could buy at the market. With luck, he could use the trade founder and precious metals he picked up instead of his essence.
The real world returned in a swirl of colors and noise. The group prepared for a fight, just in case, but was thankfully met by an empty clearing, full of birdsong. As Arushi took out her COSMOS device and started sending off messages, Damian turned to Viktor.
“Can you untie us please?” Damian asked.
Viktor smirked, “I don’t know. You two look cute like that. I think I vill leave you like this for avhile.”
Arushi cleared her throat, “Actually, Viktor it might be best to do so. Some of the decision makers in the government have decided that, now that we can send tv signals again, to send reporters to meet and interview us. I just got a heads up from my sister, my Baba will go ballistic if he sees me like this.”
“Fine, ruin my fun. But if I am on tv I can embarrass baby sister to large audience. Da! Vill vork perfectly! It vill be last time she steals mama’s last helping of pelmeni from me.” Viktor conspired.
He quickly untied the two, and went back to plotting. Damian, having suffered similar embarrassment attempts by his own sister, said a prayer for the poor unsuspecting girl. The trio didn’t have to wait long for the sound of helicopter blades to reach their ears. Over the tree tops, the helicopter soared into the clearing and made to land, buffeting the trio with kicked up dirt and debris. The side panel slid open on touchdown and a soldier gestured them in, grimacing when he caught site of Damian’s missing arm.
“Shit, sir! You need us to get you to a doctor? We can radio one to meet us at the tarmac.” The soldier yelled over the rotating chopper blades.
Damian shook his head, and yelled back, “No, need! We had it treated back in the portal. Not much left to do for it, I’m afraid.”
The helicopter took off and began the journey back to base. The soldier, and even the pilot, couldn’t keep their curiosity at bay for long. The pilots voice echoed through the headsets they wore upon sitting down.
“If you don’t mind me asking, sir? The hell took your arm?” The pilot asked.
“Damn it Stuffer, you can’t just ask like that! Ease into it, man! Fuck!” The soldier yelled at his fellow.
Damian just raised an eyebrow, and asked. “Stuffer?”
“Because he always stuffs his foot in his mouth.” The soldier replied.
The trio gave a laugh, and Damian answered their question. “Damn, dragon ate it.”
“No, shit?” Stuffer gasped.
“Yup.”
“Fuck, man. At least you have a cool story to tell about it.” The soldier said.
Damian smirked, “Would you like to hear it?”
“Is the Pope Catholic?” Stuffer replied.
The rest of the flight was spent by the trio, regaling the two soldiers with the tale of their time in the portal. The duo proved to be a great audience, reacting with excited fascination to everything they experienced. Stuffer had a bunch of questions about the dragon egg omelet. The man turned out to be a foodie of the highest caliber, and by the time the chopper landed, had convinced Viktor to cook him some of the dragon meat.
Shutting off the helicopter, Stuffer turned to them and began to tell them what to expect, once they set foot outside. “The brass set it up so, once you step outside, it will be like the red carpet walk at the Oscars. Lots of flashing cameras and cheering people, they are really trying to sell the valiant hero angle. Rude as it is to say, sir, they will probably be thrilled with the optics your lost arm will sell, so expect questions about it.”
Damian grimaced and clenched his fist, but nodded.
“At the end of the walkway you’ll see a podium, when you reach it head on up and take a seat, the major will take it from there. If you’ve seen any post-fight interview from the UFC, you’ll have a good idea what they want. The questions are mostly scripted but there will be a free question segment at the end. Expect it to get personal, they are basically trying to have the civies treat you like superstars. Any questions before Davies opens the door?” Stuffers finished.
None of them had questions, so they signaled Davies to open the door. They exited in the same order they had their party arranged in the portal. Viktor in front, Arushi in the middle, and Damian bringing up the rear. Stepping out to flashing lights and screaming people, Damian took a deep breath and repeated a mantra in his head over and over.
‘Do not punch a reporter. For the love of all things holy, Damian! DO. NOT. PUNCH.’
Damian failed to hold himself back when the group was stopped halfway. A podcast bro looking asshole, who thought asking ‘Did you never learn to dodge or something?’ would go over well. The five soldiers that pulled the unconscious man, with a newly broken jaw, away, gained bruises from wild swings and kicks Damian flung at the little bastard, as Viktor pulled Damian off. He would have to remember to apologize to those soldiers and do something nice for them later.
