At dinner, Suzu served the warm vegetable soup that Sonoko helped cook. They had just bought the vegetables off the Chiba Farm, Kosuke refusing to accept them for free even though they’ve been neighbors for nearly fifty years. Sonoko found it difficult to make conversation with Kiku after her late night excursion on their farm. Although she knew she did the right thing, Sonoko still felt guilty. Besides, Kiku was more interested in talking about herself and the fancy new school she was going to be attending in a couple months. Sonoko had to bite her tongue.

  But now it was time to open her mouth. Her conversation with Mr. Yamada had told her everything she needed to know. Or more likely it revealed something she believed all along. Suzu wasn’t a factor in Sonoko’s mind, even if she didn’t support it. It was Kosuke that was taking up the majority of the anxiety. So close to the anniversary of Shin, he could see this as a slight against him. Sonoko wished the timing was better but supposed she wouldn’t have even opened the letter otherwise.

  Her shaking hand served soup into the bowls of her father. It was customary in Arcadia for children to serve their parents. A lingering eye was the only evidence that Kosuke suspected something was wrong. Sonoko took a deep breath as she sat down.

  The only sounds were the slurping of soup and the gentle rhythm of rain on the rooftop.

  “Sonoko,” Kosuke grumbled. Sonoko’s posture straightened instantly. “We need to begin preparing for next season. I need you to dig up all the dead trees by tomorrow so we can get ready to re-fertilize the ground.” Kosuke wasn’t a man who celebrated small wins. Success was expected. They hadn’t won a prize or anything.

  “Dad, I-” she started before cutting herself off. Kosuke looked up from his bowl. The tone of her voice also grabbed Suzu’s attention. No backing down now. “I got into PsiTech.”

  For a moment, no one said anything. The silence was deafening. Sonoko thought it would feel good to finally get it off her chest but it had felt worse than the rising tension.

  “PsiTech Academy?” Suzu clarified as if she knew of a different PsiTech. Sonoko nodded. Suzu looked nervously at Kosuke, almost waiting for his reaction before she said anything. “We didn’t even know you had sent in an application.”

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  “Mr. Yamada handed it in for me,” she explained. “I got the response weeks ago but I didn’t open it until now.” More silence as Kosuke had a staring match with his soup.

  “So?” he spoke, still looking at the bowl.

  “What?” Sonoko asked.

  “What does it matter?” he said. He picked up his spoon and went about his dinner. Sonoko sat stunned. Suzu shifted uncomfortably.

  “Well, it’s a big accomplishment, Sonoko. Your father and I are, of course, very proud-”

  “Don’t speak for me!” Kosuke shouted. Suzu’s eyes darted to the table, embarrassed. Sonoko normally would’ve had a similar reaction, terrified to make eye contact. Kosuke rarely yelled. He had done so more in the years since Shin disappeared but even then it wasn’t often. When he did, fear would strike those who were the target of the outburst. Sonoko should’ve felt this fear now but she didn’t. Her father looked old. Weak. She felt sad for him and for herself.

  “You’re not proud of me?” she asked quietly. Kosuke sighed through his spoon. He pushed the bowl away from himself and grabbed the edges of the table seemingly struggling with something in his mind. Outside, the rain came down harder.

  “Pride is not an emotion to meddle with, Sonoko. It’s dangerous,” Kosuke said. Sonoko could feel her own emotions starting to bubble. No tears, just heat.

  “Were you proud of Shin?” she said. A slight gasp escaped Suzu. This time Sonoko stared at her father. His head turned towards her, a fierce scowl etched in his face.

  “Don’t-”

  “Don’t what?” Sonoko interrupted. She couldn’t stop it now. “Don’t talk about him? Even though we all think about him every minute! He was my brother, you know. And when we were kids, you would always tell us that the Makino name was something to be proud of. That one day we would go on to greater things.”

  “You were children, Sonoko!” Kosuke struck back. “You’re an adult now and things have changed.” He paused and took a deep breath. He seemed to suck all the air out of the room. “Shin isn’t with us anymore and you are. You have to take responsibility for your actions.”

  “What actions?” Sonoko said, standing up. The force of her pushing back on the table knocked her bowl over. Soup poured across the wood. “You still think I let him die. How could I ever think you would want me to carry the family name. You don’t even want me to have it anymore!” Before Kosuke could even open his mouth to refute, Sonoko stormed off up the stairs to her room. She heard her own words echoing in her mind.