My sleep is interrupted by the sound of footsteps and the opening of the bedroom door. Through the moonlight streaming in through my bedroom window, I glimpse a figure approaching my crib. My eyes, still clouded by sleep, slowly open to see my father, the Emperor, approaching my crib and standing beside it, silently watching me.

  "Your Majesty, you should not be here. If it is discovered that you have come, along with the scene you caused at the ceremony, it will only bring trouble to your daughter”, I hear someone say to the emperor, although from where I am and with my father blocking my view, I cannot see who it is.

  "I know, but now that everyone is at the celebration, this is the best opportunity I'll have for a long time. Have you checked the surroundings?" my father replies, still looking at me.

  "Yes, everyone is either asleep or we've put them to sleep, no one will know that someone has entered”, replies the stranger.

  "Good, now go out and patrol. I want to be alone with my daughter”, my father replies, looking away to the side of the room, presumably at the stranger.

  I hear the door close and my father turns to look at me again. After a moment, I see him reach out and carefully lift me out of the crib.

  I stare at him as he begins to speak to me "They told me, and even though I saw it at the ceremony, I still thought it was an exaggeration. You really are the calmest baby I've ever met."

  Shit, I think. Even though I tried to act like a baby by whining and crying a little from time to time, it seems I fell short, and on top of that, it's too late to fix it. If I started fussing more often now, it would be even weirder.

  With me in his arms, my father approaches a nearby chair and sits down while gently rocking me.

  "My little Wen”, he begins, speaking to me in a soft tone. "Ever since I learned of your birth, I have eagerly awaited the moment to hold you in my arms. I have many children, yes, but you are my only daughter. And heaven knows I've tried, twenty-two children in forty years and only one daughter."

  What he says surprises me. Forty years, how old is he? He looks to be in his thirties, but if what he says is true and his first child was born when he was, say, fifteen, considering that in ancient times people often married young, he would be at least fifty-five. Either that, or even with a dozen concubines, he has been busier than a rabbit in mating season.

  As he rocks me, his conversation flows like a quiet melody in the darkness of the room.

  "Although the heavens have played a cruel trick on both you and me”, he continues, I imagine referring to my disability.

  "Especially for you”, he finally sighs. "Especially for you."

  The room, barely lit by the moonlight filtering through the window, becomes our little world. A world where the responsibilities of an emperor seem to fade away, leaving only a father who seems to genuinely care for his daughter.

  In an attempt to ease the tension in the air, I reach out and tug on my father's beard as I begin to babble. I just hope he doesn't find it too strange.

  He is surprised by my action and smiles a little, grabbing my hand with the clear intention of getting me to stop tugging on his beard and take his hand instead, so I make it easy for him and grab one of his fingers.

  "I know the road ahead will be difficult”, he admits with a sigh, as if the words weigh heavily on him, although as he continues, I see a flash of anger cross his eyes. "There are already people who have spoken out against you, some even suggesting that you are a stain on the family's reputation and that it would be better if you had an accident."

  Hearing this, the surprise of these words makes me freeze for a moment, but remembering that I'm not supposed to understand what he's saying, I continue as if nothing had happened, clutching his finger as a trace of fear begins to grow inside me, remembering the cruelty that some ancient and even modern Chinese families are capable of, especially to repair their reputation if they believe it has been tarnished.

  "The title I have given you and the new place where you are going to live will protect you for now”, he continues. "And another thing that can protect you is that they consider a disabled person to be no threat to anyone, perhaps the only good thing that can come out of something so bad."

  Suddenly, I hear a couple of knocks on the door and my father turns his head toward it.

  "I guess it's time for me to go”, he says as he gets up and approaches the crib. Once he reaches it, he kisses me on the forehead and lets go of my hand. I start to complain and whine about it; after all, I have to keep up the act.

  "Now, sleep, little Wen. Tomorrow is another day, and they'll wake you up early to take you to your new home", with those words, he puts me back in my crib and tucks me in, dodging my attempts to grab his hands, not quite sure what to do to keep up the act, since crying out loud would seem almost sacrilegious considering the atmosphere and the situation.

  He gets up after tucking me in and turns toward the door to leave. As he walks away, the moonlight falls on his figure through the window, outlining the contours of a man who carries the weight of an empire on his shoulders, but who, at this moment, feels more like a father than an emperor. And although his words about there being people who want me dead still terrify me, I suppose having a loving father with the power of an emperor can be quite an effective shield for the moment.

  I hear the door close behind me as I leave the room, and in the stillness of the night, contemplating its contours illuminated by the moonlight streaming through the window, I begin to mull over what he has said, my situation, and what I can do, without reaching any conclusion. And so I continue until my baby's body decides that enough is enough and I fall asleep.

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  I am awakened by an unusual commotion in the room, and when I finally wake up, I notice that it is already daylight. As I uncomfortably recall last night's conversation between a father venting to his daughter, believing that she cannot understand what he is saying, I look at what little I can see through the gap in my crib.

  Through it, I can see RuNu Lianhua directing a couple of maids to collect everything in my room. One of them, passing by my crib, notices that I am awake and looking at her.

  "RuNu, Zhāohuán Wen has woken up”, the maid tells RuNu Lianhua.

  Realizing that my little body has betrayed me while I was asleep, I begin to whimper as RuNu Lianhua approaches the crib and picks me up while I continue with the charade.

  "Continue picking up the things, including the crib. If you can't handle it, ask one of the Nei Wei outside to carry it. If they object, tell them that Zhāohuán Wen can only sleep if we put her in it”, she tells the maids after checking the reason for my complaint. I want to complain about the obvious lie she is telling, which tarnishes my honor, but I doubt my babbling can express how I feel.

  After changing my clothes on a nearby table that seems to have been spared from the obvious ransacking of the room, she carries me out of the room and heads towards my mother's.

  On the way, I see the corridors full of maids, all carrying trunks that have to be carried by two people due to their bulky size, although from the ease with which they carry them, they do not seem to weigh much.

  Finally, we arrive at my mother's room, where she is talking to Fei Yi Lingxi . To my surprise, I see that it is completely empty, not even the bed remains.

  "Are you sure about this, Furen? If we empty the entire palace, the other consorts will complain”, Fei Yi Lingxi is saying to my mother.

  "Let them complain all they want. They've been bothering me for years, ever since His Majesty chose me as his favorite”, my mother replies with a fierce expression. "And ever since they found out about Wen's problem, they haven't stopped conspiring to have both her and me repudiated, saying that she is cursed and will bring misfortune to the empire. I won't leave even dust for them to plunder after we leave."

  Listening to my mother and remembering what my father said about people wanting her to have an accident, last night's fear returns, reminding me that I am in an imperial court and that the stories of cruelty told in Chinese history may not be so far from reality in this world.

  RuNu Lianhua approaches my mother, who turns to us.

  "Give her to me, I'll take her today”, my mother says as she picks me up from her arms. She looks back at Fei Yi Lingxi and says, "The entourage sent by the emperor has been waiting for a while, so we're leaving. Lingxi, you're in charge. If anyone tries to cause trouble, tell Nei Shiwei. She's already stressed enough by the situation to allow anyone to make her job more difficult. She'll take care of anyone who causes trouble."

  With that, she walks out the door without hesitation, carrying me in her arms, followed hurriedly by RuNu Lianhua. When we reach the outer courtyard, I am surprised by the sight. A dozen female guards, the Nei Wei as I assume they are called from the conversation between RuNu Lianhua and my mother, are waiting as they did when we left for the Man Yue ceremony.

  But there are even more surrounding the courtyard and forming a corridor to the exit door, preventing anyone from approaching or hindering our departure. And it's necessary. There is a real crowd filling the courtyard, all watching us leave, and I can't help but notice that we look like celebrities on the red carpet at an event. Or perhaps, with a more morbid thought resulting from the conversations about getting rid of me, like criminals going to the gallows.

  After descending the stairs of the house, the Nei Wei position themselves around my mother and RuNu Lianhua, who continue walking towards the exit escorted by them. As we walk down the corridor of guards, I look around and notice that among the mass of women in the courtyard there are several children and young people. Considering where we are, I can't help but think that those with the most luxurious clothes are probably my half-siblings. With twenty-two half-siblings, according to my father, it is inevitable that some of them are here.

  Fortunately, we exit through the gate without anyone trying to kill me, or more likely, shouting that I am the downfall of the empire or the source of all evil in the world. I suppose the sight of so many guards is enough to prevent anyone from doing anything strange, lest they lose their heads.

  As we exit the main gate of the inner courtyard, twelve more male guards join the entourage, adding even more protection to the journey.

  And that starts to scare me a little.

  Okay, after last night's visit, it's clear that my father is being overprotective of me, but twenty-four soldiers who are clearly not there for a ceremony like the Man Yue, but armed and ready for combat, may be a bit over the top, especially considering that we are in the palace and in broad daylight.

  We walk along the same paths as the night before, amid curious and surprised glances from the people we pass, almost all of them imperial officials, judging by the type of clothing they wear, until we reach the entrance to the inner palace. This time the door is not closed, and the guards let us pass with nothing more than a nod of their heads.

  In front of us, I see the staircase leading to the throne room, but this time we turn right and enter a path that crosses a kind of park. As we cross it, I notice that the park is worthy of appearing in a period film blockbuster. Nothing is missing from the Chinese aesthetic. Pagodas, streams, and carefully arranged gardens surround us, and I sigh with regret. If my current situation were not what it is, I would love to lose myself in them.

  We cross the park and arrive at what is clearly a palace. We pass through the gates into the inner courtyard, and I notice that the male guards do not go beyond the gate. I guess we have arrived at the Pavilion of the Scent of Clouds, which is what my father calls the residence he gave us at the ceremony.

  My mother stands in the center of the courtyard and sighs, as if releasing a nervousness that had not been apparent until now. We cross the courtyard and both my mother and RuNu Lianhua enter the house, and we notice that it is already furnished. And if the previous house already seemed luxurious to me, this one is off the charts.

  "Guifei Xiang, I don't think we needed to bring everything from the other house”, says RuNu Lianhua.

  "I don't care, I'm not leaving anything for those hyenas”, my mother replies, causing RuNu Lianhua to flinch at how she refers to the other consorts.

  "Find Wen's room”, she tells RuNu Lianhua as she holds me out to be picked up. "I need to talk to the Nei Shiwei of this pavilion so she can tell me how things are going to work around here."

  RuNu Lianhua picks me up without saying another word and begins to walk around the house, looking into every room. The luxury in each one makes what I saw on that TV show about the most luxurious houses in the world look ridiculous, until we finally reach a room with an XXL crib with so many decorations and jewels that it gives me the chills. When we approach and RuNu Lianhua gestures that she wants to put me in it, I make her lie about my other crib come true and start complaining and crying so she won't put me in that monstrosity.

  Surprised, RuNu Lianhua moves away from the crib, and when she sees that I stop complaining as she moves away, she chuckles and sits down in a nearby chair while rocking me.

  "Karma is strange sometimes, eh, Zhāohuán Wen”, she says as she rocks me. "I guess we'll really have to wait for them to bring your crib."

  I am relieved that RuNu Lianhua seems to be back to her old self after the whole Man Yue ceremony business. And as she rocks me, I let sleep overtake me. The move looks like it's going to take a long time, and I'd rather not be awake and bored waiting.

  As I once thought, whoever said that childhood is the best time of life was not a baby.