Chapter Twenty-Two: Work As A Spy

  ‘Pose as a friend, work as a spy’-Robert Greene

  The princess, who was secretly a man—and a loving, warm Guide!—passed the ballroom into the hallway the prince had exited, passing some Lords, Ladies, and workers who were in the midst of heated conversations and make-out sessions. As he passed two men who were sitting on a bench, he couldn’t help but overhear the words one of them said.

  “I found a beggar woman crying on the ground because she’d lost two-hundred drakons,” the nobleman was saying, his eyes filled with pity as he recounted his story. “So, of course, I had to be the better man and give her forty drakons of the two-hundred I’d found on the ground. When the Gods bless you…”

  “Bless others,” the second nobleman finished, and Elijah couldn’t help but stop himself in shock as he heard them, and he turned to them with an exasperated sigh.

  “Are you serious?” He asked. “The two-hundred you found belonged to the old lady.”

  “What?” The first nobleman replied, confusion lighting his face. “No they didn’t. I found them on the ground, and the old lady had lost them. I don’t know how they could be the same.”

  “How fucking thick can you be? You found the two-hundred she lost!”

  “That doesn’t make any sense,” the second nobleman butted in. “She lost them, he only found them. How could they be lost if he found them?”

  Is this just an act, or are they really this stupid? Elijah groaned inwardly, trying his best not to grate his teeth and failing.

  No one knows. The Lords Melnior are known for their acts of stupidity, but it may just be a means of making themselevs known. As you can see, they have not even been treating you as a member of Royalty. But why are you entertaining them? You have a Lord to chase!

  Right! Without another word, Elijah kept going, ignoring the confused Lords. Turning the corner, out of the corner of his eye, Elijah saw one of them shrugging and whispering:

  “Did you see her? She looks a lot like the princess!”

  The other one pursed his lips.

  “I don’t see the resemblance.”

  Ignoring them, the princess sped forwards down the hallways the Lord-heir had turned in, finding it already deserted. There were three doors in the hallway, one on each side and one at the end, which was a set of double doors.

  Which one should I head for? He asked his Guide.

  I’m not sure.

  Some help you are.

  Want some advice? Take the one in the middle! Double doors are always the answer.

  Elijah narrowed his eyes, and turned to the door on the left, which was ajar and opened it up, revealing what was another hallway, longer than the last with windows portraying the outside. The only exit from the hallway was a door that led straight to the grounds, and since through the window the princess couldn’t see anyone, he moved on, eager to locate where the prince had gone.

  Hey! I hear voices from the right!

  “What?” Elijah responded, ears perked up as he focused on them, eager to hear a word. “How can you hear anything if I can’t? You’re in my mind!”

  Skill issue. Look, there it is again!

  This time, the princess heard it too, and, just like the Guide had said, it was coming from the room to the right.

  Might be the Lord Thomas. You may want to check, but don’t make yourself known.

  Nodding softly so his Guide knew he understood, he edged towards the door, crouching down to peer through the keyhole, and, while he couldn’t see much—it’s a small hole, what do you expect?—he could at least see what seemed like a maid folding blankets from a bed. Her voice and the voice of a man next to her that he couldn’t see were almost whispered, but placing his ear to the door, he could just barely make out what they were saying.

  “—Lord Penrose is unfit to rule, I think,” the maid was saying. “I don’t think he’s truly ready to stay in the spotlight.”

  Are they talking about Thomas? Elijah thought.

  No, if someone mentions a Lord without using their first name and only their last, it isn’t the heir. They’re speaking of the Lord himself.

  “I think he just needs time for people to see who he is now, after a year of bumbling around,” the other man was saying. “He’s been relying on the Lady Marria Penrose to rule in his stead, but the court is restless.”

  “It may be too late to return to who they were before,” the maid said. “Especially without the last—”

  “That is why he is relying on the princess,” the man replied. “As long as her Highness Amanda Gold helps our family take another step up, then I think we may just be alright.”

  The maid grunted, finishing folding her blankets and cocking her head slightly, lost in thought.

  “I like the princess, you know,” she said finally. “A good fit for the Lord Thomas.”

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  “I agree, but I do not want them to be reunited in marriage, if for our sake more than anything.” The man said, and finally he came into view. He looked like just another butler, with a short mustache and a scowl placed firmly on his face as he walked towards the maid. There was something about him that told Elijah he was no mere butler, but the thought was dispelled when the butler turned to the door and strolled to it.

  Shit! Shit! Shit! He screamed inside as he stumbled backwards, running for the double doors, careful to make as little sound as possible. The doors swung open and he scrambled inside just as the door opened to the bedroom he had been spying in. Thankfully, the butler and maid walked in the opposite direction as him, and he sighed in relief to himself as he watched them leave.

  What do you think it all meant? Elijah asked his Guide.

  I’m not sure, but something’s wrong, I can feel it. We must learn what is happening with the Lord Penrose.

  I agree, I’m curious too. Do you have any theories yet?

  Plenty, but I doubt any of them are plausible, Guide Amanda replied.

  You think he was really just sick?

  Are roses red?

  Yes.

  What? The voice in his head exclaimed. No, they’re not. They’re pink, that’s why they’re called roses, because they’re rosy!

  No, they’re definitely red.

  Then why aren’t they called reds?

  Because that sounds stupid!

  So do you right now! What color do you think oranges are?

  Orange! Elijah exclaimed. The sky is blue, grass is green, and I hate you.

  Must be true, if it rhymes and let me just say right now, that was offensive!

  Last time I said it, you were happy to hear it.

  That’s because last time, we were having a cute moment. This moment is anything but cute. A princess like you should know the color of a rose.

  What about the poem? Roses are red, violets are blue, I wrote you this poem because I love you?

  First of all, Guide Amanda gagged. That is absolutely disgusting. If you think Lord Thomas is corny, you should hear yourself. Secondly, I’m a voice so falling in love with me is weird. And thirdly, VIOLETS ARE NOT BLUE! DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF?

  YES THEY ARE! Elijah screamed in his head, a headache forming as he argued heatedly with his Guide, albeit without real anger. VIOLETS ARE BLUE!

  NO, THEY’RE VIOLET PURPLE! IT’S IN THE NAME!

  IT’S A MISNOMER!

  SO ARE YOU, Princess Elijah!

  Elijah rolled his eyes, ending the conversation although he could hear the Guide both cackling at her self-pronounced victory in the argument and cursing at his supposed stupidity in his head.

  Stepping backwards, he found himself hitting a wall, except the wall grunted softly and wrapped its arms around him until his eyes widened as he recognized it was not a wall but in fact, a person.

  And…the longest time it has taken a human a simple fact to process goes to…Amanda Gold!

  “I know you love me, but stumbling in my arms was not what I expected,” Lord Thomas teased from behind him as he placed a gentle kiss on the princess’ ear, and Elijah quickly separated himself, causing the Lord-heir to cross his arms and narrow his arms. “But what are you doing here, Amanda?”

  “Well…uh…” Elijah stammered. “The…uh…dances were…about to start…I think…and…uh…my boyfriend…who is the host…should be there, but…I saw you weren’t, so I came to find you.” Inside his head, the Guide, for once, was silent, but he decided it was a very condescending silence.

  Really? I can’t even be silent without you insulting me? She asked.

  Lord Thomas smiled and nodded. “I understand, you’re right. I was just talking with one of my workers about an urgent matter regarding…my father.” His voice cracked slightly and his eyes drooped softly, and Elijah, against his better judgment, reached out a hand to comfort him.

  “Is he ok?” He asked, doing his best to keep a pitying look on his face, one that spoke of love and trust instead of the curiosity fighting to overpower him.

  “He’s just fine,” Lord Thomas Penrose responded quickly, his glance shifting quickly just like his legs, his discomfort and fear plainly shown in his body language, as if he was lying. “Shall we dance?”

  Just like that, the conversation was over, and although Elijah tried to bring the subject up without prodding, the heir to the Penrose family would have nothing to do with it.

  ---

  The official dances started soon, and this time, Elijah did stumble around as he switched partners over and over. The dance was weird, and even his muscle memory couldn’t help him as he moved back and forth between the Lords. As far as he could tell, the dance had a sort of rhythm where for a few moves he danced with one Lord and then spun around to face someone else. To him, though, the spinning was completely random and he found himself tripping a few times, but thankfully, the Lords mostly seemed to take it as a joke, teasing them for being so ‘flattering’.

  The only thing Lords love more than dancing is a compliment, Guide Amanda told him. Or a kiss, or a good lay, but that’s Lords for you.

  “You look gorgeous today, your highness,” one Lord said as he danced with her. “Have you come to join your paramour?”

  “Can a princess not enjoy a courtly ball?” He responded, barely keeping his momentum as he stepped forward and back, raising his eyebrows flirtily. “I have come to accompany Lord Thomas Penrose, yes, but I also love to dance and enjoy the politics of those who have nothing better to do with their lives.”

  “Aye, that’s the truth,” the Lord laughed. “Well, it was a pleasure to see you, your highness. I am beyond excited for your coronation.”

  “I appreciate it,” Elijah finished as he spun around. “And keep an eye on the Penroses. Something tells me they won’t need my help in the future.”

  When he landed in the arms of his next partner, he was stunned to find one of the Lords Melnior.

  What’s his name?

  No one knows, Guide Amanda replied. They’re always together, so they’re only referred to as the Lords.

  They’re not together now.

  You'll see.

  “Princess,” the Lord whispered urgently to her. “You are in danger.”

  “What do you mean?” Elijah asked, breath catching in his throat at the Lord’s somber expression, no teasing in his gaze. “What’s happened?”

  “There’s someone in the halls,” he said, spinning her around in the smooth dance. “And they look exactly like you. It’s someone disguised as you, so I would beware.”

  “I still don’t see the resemblance,” a voice whispered in his ear, and the princess jumped in shock, a slight squeal escaping his mouth as he found the other Lord Melnior, who winked at him. “If you asked me, it was just a confused Lady looking for her cheating husband.”

  “How would you know that unless you’re the one he’s cheating with,” the first Lord narrowed his eyes accusingly, poking the man in the chest, all semblance of the dance lost.

  “He can’t, he was right next to you the whole time! And that was me!” Elijah exclaimed with a sigh, resisting the urge to slap his face.

  “No, the Lord Melnior is right!” The second Lord replied, his eyes widening in shock as he stumbled backwards, clutching his head. “What if he was cheating on her with me and I didn’t know!”

  Before Elijah could respond scathingly, the doors to the ballroom opened and a ragged, feral-looking woman stumbled through, chest breathing rapidly and her gaze flitting back and forth. A guard, who must’ve been hiding on the grounds or inside the mansion rushed after her, but she escaped his grasp, running straight to the Lords, who all scattered around her. Her brown hair was dirty, as was her face, and her blue eyes were unnerving. Her dress was in tatters, but Elijah could see the glint of something metallic, maybe jewelry, through the curve of her dress and breasts.

  “I need the Princess Gold!” The woman screamed, a high-pitched urgent tone that not only demanded attention but pleaded for help. “Please, I need to see her! I know she’s here! Princess Amanda Gold!”