Chapter Two: Being A Woman

  Elijah screamed, a shrill, feminine, high-pitched shriek that behooved his new body and not his old one.

  Ah, I’m only teasing you, Amanda, the voice continued, decidedly joyful now. What’s wrong? Never heard someone in your head before?

  “Why are you in my head?” He asked, mind reeling from the shock of an unfamiliar, sarcastic voice coming from nowhere and everywhere simultaneously. His own voice surprised him; it was obviously of a teenage girl, and although the words fit him, his voice did not. “Who the hell is Amanda, and, most importantly, who the hell are you?”

  The strange voice cackled, but he couldn’t be sure if it was a laugh, as it lacked emotion, being a mental sound, not a physical one.

  How do you not recognize yourself, Amanda? Elijah, feeling chills at the pronouncement, guessed Amanda was the name of the woman that he was in the body of. I’m inside your head because I am your Guide, here to welcome you to the wonderful land of Advantia, which I am sure you’ll love, just like I did.

  “Just like you did?” Elijah said. “You didn’t answer the question I asked you before, oh wise guide. Who are you?”

  I did answer that question, dumbass, the chipper voice continued, and he picked up a bit of irony in her subtle inflection. As I have already mentioned to you, I am your Guide, but I understand that’s not what you want from me. Not long ago, people knew me as Amanda Gold, Princess of Advantia, daughter of Queen Evangeline and Consort Reynolds, who is deceased.

  “How can you be Amanda if you called me that?”

  Listen up, please, the voice said. I was recounting to you my tale, and, unless you do not desire to understand what is happening, then keep talking. Ah, now you shut up, see? You should’ve known the answer at this point, but apparently, you have not, so let me explain. I was Amanda until you became Amanda.

  “Are you saying that I took over your body?” He wondered. “And please call me Elijah. That is my name; Amanda is just the shape I seem to inhabit right now.”

  Congratulations, Amanda, you’ve figured it out! Yes, the form you are currently in is Amanda Gold’s, or, in other words, it is mine. You conquered Amanda’s soul, turning it into a Guide, which is me—I can’t believe I have to say that, but you wouldn’t have gotten it otherwise—and so I am here to explain to you the wonders of this world.

  Elijah’s—or Amanda’s—mouth dropped, his brain trying to process all the information the old princess’ voice had been oh-so-happily providing.

  “But I didn’t want to conquer Princess Amanda’s soul!”

  Then why did you do it? The voice sounded confused now, and Elijah shared its emotion, although it was for different reasons than the voice. As your guide, Amanda, or Elijah, or whatever you told me, I am here to instruct you on how you shall live your life in Advantia, how the world works, and what you shall do as the crown princess.

  “I know how the world works: I’ve studied science!”

  I do not see how science is important here, Guide Amanda said. You need to learn about levels and skills, mana, and relationships. When I was Amanda Gold, which to some degree I still am, I was a level 24 princess. Now that you have taken over my body, you were demoted back to level 1. At sixteen years old, it’s abnormal to be at level 1, and it’s shameful.

  “I’m sorry, but I understand nothing you just said,” Elijah retorted. “What are levels or skills or all of the other damn insane things you mentioned?”

  You are not making this any easier, Amanda. Levels are a crucial part of all existence here in Advantia. Everyone has levels based on their occupation; one is more powerful and well-respected the more they possess. As a level 24 princess, I, Amanda, now your Guide, was very strong; as a level 1 princess, you, Amanda, once Elijah, are very weak. Does that make sense?

  “Maybe?” Elijah said. “I assume those levels are similar to those in video games, but I’m not sure. What about the others?”

  Ah yes, skills. Every time you level up, you earn a skill. Skills are an important means of making your life easier or more fruitful. You shall learn to cherish your skills and become wiser for it. The skill you earned for level 1 is Political Ease. This will make thinking and planning political or diplomatic moves more simple, especially with other members of foreign royal houses, as much of your job as princess involves debating and compromising with other royals.

  “You do know I’m still very confused, right?”

  You’ll learn as you go along. Mana is the third aspect you must be instructed on. The more Mana you earn, the closer you get to leveling up, by increasing all your different abilities. There are many ways to take or earn Mana, including killing someone, making them surrender Mana to you, and shaming them, although you can also earn it from passive means. Relationships are the last thing I shall teach you before I guide you through your first day. Relationship score will help you with dealing with other people and understanding them more.

  There are three slides in relationships. The first is love; the more someone loves you, the easier it shall be for you to communicate or interact with them, and the more intimate your relationship shall be. Trust is the second slide; the more a person trusts you, the better off you shall be, especially in your friendship with them. Finally, the third is exclusive to members of royal families: authority; the more authority you hold over others, the more weight your commands shall have, and others shall have more of an impulse to obey you.

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  “I think I’m beginning to understand,” Elijah said. “But before we do anything else, I need to piss.”

  Guide Amanda sighed, and he chuckled to himself.

  There is a restroom right over there, she told him.

  Somehow, he understood which direction Amanda was talking about, and there he found a door he hadn’t noticed before.

  Upon opening it, he discovered a lavish bathroom that provided more than he would’ve ever needed back on Earth. In the bathroom, there was a different mirror, slightly smaller than the one in Amanda’s room—his room, he corrected himself—but still bigger than any mirror he had in his previous house. The bath was so large that it could have accommodated at least three different Elijahs, although the notion caused him to blush because of the girl living in his mind.

  “You won’t be watching me while I’m in there, will you?” He asked, embarrassed but indignant.

  Do you remember that this used to be my body, Elijah? The voice responded to him, rolling its eyes metaphorically. And you mustn't say what you are thinking out loud. I can hear your thoughts just fine.

  “That’s creepy as hell! I still don’t want you peeping! I prefer talking out loud, thank you very much. It provides a modicum of modesty for me.”

  Modicum? Elijah thought. Where the hell did I learn that word?

  Must be the world of Advantia getting to you and your dumb ass already, the Guide chuckled. Whatever world you lived in before made your vocabulary too informal, which, you can see, affected me as well, being your guide. The longer you stay here in Advantia, though, the better your language will be.

  “Wait, are you telling me I’ll start using smart words instead of normal ones?”

  Precisely. You didn’t know that word, did you? The sarcasm was evident despite the lack of tone, and Elijah felt he had to defend himself from the extremely annoying voice assaulting his mind and language.

  “Yes, I knew that word. It means exactly, which is another word I know! Also, did you say you knew my thoughts?”

  Oh yes. As soon as you saw Amanda’s curvaceous body, I understood that…

  “Enough! I get it.” Elijah gritted his teeth, annoyance sparking in him. He did not want a sarcastic robot in his brain reading his thoughts 24/7, for obvious reasons, and hated being in another world, too. This was just one hell of a nightmare, one he needed to escape asap!

  I heard that part too. And no, I am not a robot. I cognize, and everything I say is from my own precious free will. I am not some machine or automaton stuck in your head; the soul I am is what remains after you killed it, willingly or not, so I am still human, at least as much as a disembodied voice can be.

  “I get it!” Elijah screamed. “Just please be quiet while I do my business.”

  Fine.

  Thirty minutes later, Elijah walked out of the bathroom, cheeks flushed red, and anger bursting in his head. This had been the most awkward situation he’d ever experienced, and he never wished to repeat it.

  His first problem was that the voice—Guide or Amanda, whatever you prefer, it jumped in—had been humming while he sat on the toilet, occasionally giving him comments about how bad he was at this.

  Worse than that, though, was his attempt to piss. He had had many problems just trying to remove or disentangle the dress somehow, which caused him an endless amount of nervousness, frustration, and embarrassment, something Amanda—honestly, I prefer Guide; it fits me better, don’t you think?—teased him ferociously about. Then there had been adapting to his new…—female reproductive organs, I generously provide you, my knowledge knowing no bounds—yes, female reproductive organs. While gritting his teeth again, Elijah cursed the Guide in his subconscious—you know I can still hear you, right?—and resumed his train of thought.

  It had taken him at least ten minutes to piss after he’d shifted the comfortable yet infuriating dress, and, later, it’d taken him five more to shift the dress back.

  Being a woman was difficult, and he was only now realizing it.

  You’re exaggerating, the Guide said, and he assumed she was amused. Life shall get much harder for you, Amanda. You can be sure of that.

  “Is this world misogynistic?” He wondered, hoping he had not traveled to a planet of prejudice.

  There’s a queen. Don’t be daft, his Guide responded. My god, this will be so much worse than I expected.

  He sighed in relief, smoothing his dress that still felt odd on him. Also, the plunging neckline was bothering him; if he was stuck in this body at present, he refused to flaunt his assets, at least, not like it was now.

  Beautiful, right, Amanda?

  Jumping in the air, Elijah shrieked, and, again, he noticed how much higher pitched his new voice was. He glared at nowhere, hoping the Guide could understand the look was pointed at her, though he was thinking it, so she most likely understood.

  “Are you going to call me Elijah or Amanda?”

  Aw, you’re no fun, answering a question with another question. The Guide huffed. I’ll call you whatever I want to at the moment. Is that clear? Now answer my question before I scramble your mind!

  “You can do that?” Elijah asked, horrified at the prospect. Upon detecting anger from the voice, he wised up and responded. “Yes, Amanda is beautiful, or I guess I am beautiful.”

  The Guide tittered. Falling in love with yourself already, are you? Now, it is time to begin your first day as Princess Amanda of Advantia. Forget everything you know about yourself, Elijah. You are not a boy, a commoner, or an uncultured swine anymore—offense very much meant. When we go outside, make sure you follow my instructions. When I believe you are ready—and only when I say so—will I allow you any sort of autonomy!

  “So, you’re telling me I am a puppet with no free will?”

  No, of course not. The Guide paused for a second. Yes, that’s exactly what I am telling you. Although you do have free will, you must lend your ear to me unless you aspire to be arrested and executed, and while I would adore to see that happen to you, I am still attached to this body of yours. Do not ruin it or I will ruin you.

  “Thank you for the optimism,” Elijah rolled his eyes and pulled up his dress a little, attempting to cover some of the cleavage.

  Anytime, Amanda, anytime. Now go out and prove you’re a princess to everyone.

  He took a deep breath, preparing himself for his new lifestyle of luxury and comfort as a woman he’d never been or known in a whole new world.

  He wasn’t sure he was ready, but he was damned if that would stop him from surviving. If he was really in danger if he performed wrong, he would do everything he could to become the princess he had to be, for his own sake—and mine, the Guide exclaimed happily.

  Elijah sighed, looked up, and opened the chamber door.