Quilla wasn’t sure why she thought of it as a barn. Had Ookpik ever called it a barn? She couldn’t be sure. However, it didn’t have any animals in it and was more like a big shed. Yet calling it a barn seemed correct somehow.

  She wasn’t even sure why she was thinking about this. Anything to pass the time, she supposed. And get her mind off her nerves, of course.

  She hadn’t spoken to Vern yet, and Vern would be here any moment, expecting to start the tattoo. She probably should have, but there was no opportunity during the day while Vern was off with the hunting groups, and in the evening, she couldn’t say anything without giving away she’d spoken to Ookpik about it.

  Excuses really. She could have asked to speak to Vern in private earlier this evening. She’d just been too terrified. How could she tell Vern when telling her felt like a betrayal? And if not getting the fucking tattoo was a betrayal, maybe she should get it after all? What did Ookpik know anyway? Surely the tattoo couldn’t corrupt her if she didn’t let it. Her actions were her own, tattoo or not. If it was possible to be evil without it—which it certainly was—then it was possible to be good with it.

  But what if Ookpik was right?

  The barn door swung open, bringing with it the bitterly cold night air. Vern strode in, carrying one of her travel bags. She pulled the door closed behind her. “Right. We’ll need a couple chairs, and you’ll want a blanket. This isn’t the warmest place and you’re going to need to strip down a little.” She dragged a couple chairs over to a relatively clear space in the middle of the barn, and tossed her bag on the floor beside them. “Oh, Annai wanted to know if you wanted her along, but I told her she should get some sleep. It would be boring for her. Though I didn’t think to ask if maybe you wanted her here for moral support. I hope that’s okay. I can go get her if you want.”

  “No, that’s okay. Can we...uh...can we talk?”

  “Sure.” Vern sat in one of the chairs and opened her bag. “I need a few minutes to set up anyway. Go ahead.”

  It was now or never. “It’s actually about the tattoo.”

  Vern was placing several vials from her bag onto the floor. “I know I haven’t said much about the actual process, if that’s what you’re wondering. I’ll be using pretty much the same method the local Zunsen...I mean In’ukt. Sorry, I have to do better about that. Anyway, it’s the same basic method they use. It’s called skin stitching. I’ll—”

  “No,” Quilla said. “That’s not what...I mean...I’m not sure…”

  “Fuck.” Vern put her bag down and buried her face in her hands. “You’re having second thoughts, aren’t you?” She looked up. “That’s okay. Perfectly normal. You’ve never gotten a tattoo before and you’re nervous. I get it.”

  “No, it’s not that. I mean, yes, I’m nervous, but…”

  Vern looked up at her with narrowed eyes. “But what?”

  Quilla sighed. Vern needed to know the full truth. “Look, Ookpik knows.”

  Vern’s eyes widened. “What?” She stood up. “You fucking told her?” She clutched her hand in a fist and advanced towards Quilla. “Why the fuck would you do something like that?”

  Quilla held up her hands and backed up a bit. She didn’t really believe Vern would get violent, but… She wouldn’t do that, right? “She knew, all right. She confronted me today about it. About your tattoo that you wear on your fucking neck so openly.”

  Vern paused. “She knew what it is?”

  Quilla nodded.

  “And she’s said nothing until now? That makes a lot of fucking sense!”

  “She wanted to be sure you knew what it was. She said sometimes people get tattoos without knowing what they symbolise.”

  Vern took a couple deep breaths.. “Fine, that actually does make some sense. I wouldn’t have thought somebody out in the middle of fucking nowhere would have any knowledge of it. Damn.”

  “I get the impression Ookpik has experienced a lot of the world in her time,” Quilla said.

  Vern nodded, still breathing deeply and slowly. Then she spun round and kicked the table. “Fuck! So what did you tell her?”

  “I had to tell her something. I had to convince her not to throw us all out or worse, so I told her pretty much everything. My whole story. Everything. More than I’ve told you, I think.”

  Vern pounded her fists on the table. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. And what did she say?”

  “She was...somewhat understanding. But she said if I get the tattoo, she’ll kick us out.”

  Vern laid her hands palm down on the table and leaned on it. “Okay. We’ll do the tattoo and leave first thing in the morning. We’d have to leave eventually anyway. We’ll head farther north, find another village to stay in for a little while.”

  “Vern.”

  “It’s best if we keep moving around. It’ll make things more difficult for anybody looking for us.”

  “Vern!”

  “What?”

  “She offered me an alternative.”

  Vern leaned more heavily on her arms, her head hanging low. “What alternative?”

  Quilla took a deep breath, and explained about Ookpik’s wizardly abilities and the magical tattoo that would offer protection. She watched Vern carefully the whole time, but Vern continued to lean against the table, head hanging low.

  Vern didn’t look up when Quilla finished. “I didn’t commit to anything. I needed to talk to you first. Ookpik thinks I shouldn’t trust you, and to be honest, I have to question if she’s right.”

  “I haven’t proven myself to you yet?”

  “Vern, I want to trust you. I really do. Against my better judgement, I like you. I like you a lot. But I just don’t understand why you want this so much. Yes, I’m the Catalyst, and protecting the Catalyst is a prestigious job. I get why you would take it when the offer is there. What I don’t get is why it’s so important when the offer isn’t there. Why not just go get another job?”

  Vern didn’t move, didn’t look up, said nothing.

  “If you can’t be open with me, why should I trust you?”

  Vern finally stood up, taking a deep breath as she did so. “If I tell you, are you going to run to Ookpik and tell her? Or Annai?”

  Quilla shook her head. “I won’t tell anyone if you don’t want me to. But I need to know for myself why you want this so badly.”

  Vern turned around, turned back again, looked like she was about to say something, then turned away again. “Fuck it, fine.” She started to pace back and forth and around the chairs. “I told you about my sister, right?”

  “Not much, but a little, yeah.”

  “Well, it has to do with her. Where I come from…” She paused in her pacing, and seemed to mull something over.

  Quilla gave her a moment. It was probably best not to say anything that might upset her and make her change her mind about talking.

  Eventually, Vern resumed pacing and said, “Where I come from, my sister’s betrayal affects not just her, but her entire family. We were all disgraced, and my father...well, let’s just say he’s had to pay a heavy price. I’m tasked with finding her. The only thing that can end our disgrace is if I find her and bring her to justice. Nobody really expects me to be able to do that, as she’s probably already dead by this point. See, it’s my punishment to spend the rest of my life looking for her. However, in the unlikely event she’s still alive and I find her, I can actually restore my family’s honour.” She paused in her pacing. “Following?”

  Quilla shrugged. “Sort of. I understand what you’re saying, but how does bonding with me help you find your sister, especially if she’s probably already dead?”

  Vern sat in one of the chairs and rubbed her forehead. “Because I happen to know my sister is alive. At least, she was about sixteen months ago.”

  This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

  Quilla approached her slowly. “Go on. How do you know this?”

  Vern glared at her. There was anger in her eyes, though Quilla was fairly certain it wasn’t directed at her. “Because your husband told me. I’m not sure what his reasons for it were. He just told me. But he also told me he couldn’t tell me where she was for reasons he couldn’t tell me. All he would say was he couldn’t let me find her yet, but maybe at a later time.”

  Gods damn it, Dyle.

  Quilla turned the other chair so it faced Vern and sat in it. “So, you want to bond with me as a way of getting to Dyle?”

  Vern looked her in the eyes. “I thought if I could protect you, keep you alive, and bring you to him in Collogia…”

  “He might reward you by telling you where your sister is.”

  Vern gave a forced chuckled. “Got it in one.”

  What the fuck game was Dyle trying to play here? Gods only knew. Dyle better already be dead, or Quilla was going to kill him for the torment he’d put Vern through. Hell, if he was already dead, she might just kill him again.

  There was a tear forming in Vern’s eye. Vern turned her head away, sniffing and wiping the tear away.

  “Can I tell you a secret of my own, Vern?” Quilla said.

  “Seeing as we’re in a secrets-telling mood,” Vern said with a smile, “why not?”

  “Ulises felt I shouldn’t tell you or the others this, but that whole situation’s all fucked up now, so fuck him. Dyle’s not my husband. Not anymore. We were married years ago, yes, and he likes to think we’re still married, but I got away from him a long time ago. I re-encountered him recently, but I really don’t want to be anywhere near him. I only agreed to any of this because Ulises gave me no other choice.”

  Vern sighed. “Well, it explains why his wife isn’t a Servant. Still, he obviously still wants you around, so I’m not sure how that’s supposed to convince me not to take you to him.”

  Quilla shrugged. “It’s not really meant to do that. However, there’s another part to the secret. There’s a good chance Dyle’s dead.”

  “Dead? How?”

  “It’s a bit of long story, which I’ll be happy to tell you later, but the last time I saw him, he had been badly injured. It was probably a mortal wound, but he had this pearl. A magical pearl. It could transport people to other locations in the blink of an eye. It took him and a friend of mine away. I don’t know where, and I have no idea if he’s alive or dead, but I really hope he’s dead. And like I said, there’s a good chance he is.”

  “So what you’re saying is, no reward?”

  Quilla shook her head. “Probably not. Sorry.”

  Vern burst out laughing.

  Quilla watched her for a moment, perplexed, but after a moment, the laughter was just too contagious and she joined in.

  When Vern got herself under control, she said, “The fucking irony, right? Gods fucking damn it!” She bent over and buried her head in her hands. “I really am going to spend the rest of my life doing this. I never get to go home.”

  Quilla slid her chair over beside Vern and put an arm around her. “Don’t give up entirely. You know she’s alive. Maybe you can find her another way.”

  Vern looked at her, tears in her eyes. “Yeah, maybe, but it’s hard to have hope at this point.”

  Quilla drew her in closer and Vern laid her head on Quilla’s shoulder. They sat like that for a little while. Vern sniffled a couple times and wiped her eyes, but otherwise, they remained unmoving. Quilla wasn’t entirely sure how long. A few minutes, maybe. But it was nice.

  Eventually, Vern said, “So, I guess the tattoo’s totally out now?”

  “Is there really any point?” Quilla said. “You could hold out hope Dyle’s still alive, I suppose.”

  “Honestly, that was my initial reason for wanting this. But I’ve grown to like you. A lot. I actually want to help you.”

  Quilla sighed and leaned her head against Vern’s. She could still do this. Even with Vern knowing the truth now, there would still be Darkers hunting her. She was still in danger. And she doubted Ookpik’s offer would be enough. “I’ll do it.”

  Vern looked up at her. “Really?”

  “On two conditions. One, we don’t go to Collogia. We go to Quorge.”

  Vern stared at her a moment, then laid her head back on Quilla’s shoulder with a sigh. “You want to go to the Will-Breaker.”

  “Yes. Sort of. Felit?a and I have had our differences, and we don’t see eye to eye on everything these days, but she’s a friend, and my best chance for safety in the long run.”

  “What will she think of a Darker being with you?”

  Quilla groaned. “She probably won’t like it, but I’ll stand my ground. She owes me a few things. I’ll make sure she doesn’t hurt you. But she’s only part of the reason I want to go there. My son is there too.”

  Vern sat up. “Your son?”

  Quilla nodded.

  “The Child of the Volgs,” Vern breathed.

  “I’d rather you didn’t call him that.”

  Vern gulped. “Sorry. What’s his name?”

  “Corvinian.”

  “Is Dyle...um…?”

  “The father? Yes, unfortunately.”

  “Wow. Okay, we’ll go to Quorge. The second condition?”

  “We don’t do it here. We’ll leave first. We can leave in the morning if you want, or whenever. But I think we owe to Ookpik not to do it while we’re still here.”

  Vern nodded. “Fair. What’s another day or two?”

  “Then yes, I’ll get the fucking tattoo.”

  Vern hugged her. “Thank you.”

  Quilla hugged her back, but the hug went on a bit longer than she expected, and after a while, she pulled back. “So, what’s your sister’s name?”

  “It doesn’t matter,” Vern said. “She won’t be using it. You think Veronique is my real name?”

  “Fair point. What’s your real name then?”

  “I could tell you that or…” Vern leaned in close to her, her cheek almost touching Quilla’s, like she was going to whisper in her ear. However, instead she merely breathed in deeply a couple times.

  Quilla pulled back a bit. “What was that?”

  “Sorry, just enjoying your scent. It’s intoxicating?”

  “My scent?”

  Vern nodded, a look in her eyes that… Was that lust?

  Quilla gulped. Her heart pounded. “That’s...um...weird.”

  Vern laughed. “I suppose it is, but I really love your scent. I have since I first smelled it.”

  Right. There had been that moment when they first met. Quilla had forgotten about that. What the hell was that about? But it didn’t really matter at the moment. Right now, Vern still had that look in her eyes. In the past, Quilla had seen a similar look in Dyle’s eyes. In Garet’s. But she’d never seen it in a woman’s—at least not directed at her. She’d seen it in glances between Felit?a and Maneshka on Scovese, but never at her.

  She wasn’t interested in women that way. Only men. At least, there had never previously been a woman who turned her head that way. But Vern was…

  Vern was the last woman she should be thinking of in this way. She was a fucking Darker. But she was also strangely devoted to Quilla, and Quilla trusted her and even… Was the reason she trusted Vern because she was attracted to her?

  “You look confused and nervous,” Vern said.

  “Oh, um, yeah, I…”

  Vern touched the back of her hand lightly against Quilla’s cheek, sending a shiver down Quilla’s spine. “No need to be nervous. I won’t bite unless you want me to.”

  Quilla gulped. Her heart pounded harder.

  “Tell me to back off and I will,” Vern said. “No questions asked. But…”

  Did she want this? She hadn’t been with anyone since Garet died. Was the length of time making her more desirous? That was a dumb reason to want this. Or maybe she just wanted it. Yes, she wanted this. She might regret it tomorrow, but right now, she wanted it.

  “I’ve never been with a woman,” Quilla said.

  With a smile, Vern leaned in and kissed her. Quilla shivered.

  “Then don’t think of me as a woman,” Vern said, running a hand over Quilla’s chest.

  Shaking, Quilla could barely get words out. “Then what...what should I think of you as?”

  Vern kissed her neck a couple times before answering. When she did she had a wide grin on her face. “The best you’ve ever had.”

  Quilla wrapped her arms around Vern. “That’s a big claim.”

  “Trust me.”

  “I do.” They kissed passionately for several seconds.

  Then Vern proved her claim.

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