(i just lay there on my bed with a blank look on my face)
"..............................."
(my head racing with next to nothing in it, just the words: identity, lost, did, them, reason, why, was, matter, tree, mirror, who)
(i rub my head when it begins to hurt)
(the words slowly changed to a clean slate, more, possibilities, calm down, )
"....okay,.. the reason they did it was probably so I'd have more variety in my exploratory avatars...so the appearance and gender thing. but why did they give me no name?! a name gender-neutral name would be fine,...but I bet they sent a lot more swarms into the infinite void of space,......well,...I'll just give myself one for now"
"..........druzy...that’s a good gender-neutral name and feels right with what I will do... I can change it whenever I want. because ...im..alone."
(something pings in my mind)
...."when will I land on a planet? ..was I awoken right after launch, or, a long while after? what is the time perspective differential of inside here compared to outside?"
(i get up and move to the console room to check)
".....5 light-years after escaping earth's orbit, 1.2 seconds after launch...and the perspective difference is...set to 1/60: inside/outside,.. good, so I won't be stuck, every second lasting for hours, alone in a kingdom for one."
"but space is big, and my pods will only land of a mere fraction of the total amount of planets......MAN am I morbid!"
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..."...the sanctum also has simulated food,... I suddenly feel like a chocolate cake, a luxury my family didn't have before I joined...."
(i smile a little, because of the fact they're doing better because of me.)
....... I wonder if I can bookmark appearances and feeling setting for my body inside the sanctum.
(i check, and yes.)
let’s see...so that’s what I currently look like.
(the screen shows a 3d model of the digital avatar's appearance: currently, it's, a jumpsuited human body with a rig head; a tad disturbing)
"Jesus Christ! that’s horrifying, headless would have been less creepy..."
"time to have some fun with the sanctum avatar appearance"
(i switch between a few different bodies: a fat woman, a super buff man, a Frankenstein, and a small hipster-looking woman, until I stick to the look of an androgynous young person with a half buzzcut hairdo dyed aqua blue and glitchy eyes wearing a black and grey shirt with grey striped sleeves, green sweatpants, sneakers, and a pink tutu.....for now, why something so weird? BECAUSE I CAN! I have no one to impress, it just feels right)
"..now,...what to do now...I need a pet,...talking to myself is getting....strange, ..or hopefully land soon so I can make a person .... before I start talking like Gex."
"better get started on creating a personality matrix,"
(i bring up the personality matrix emulator)
"I think somebody like from the early years of the 2000s, maybe late 1900s, mostly so I have more to talk to them about, musician, to negate the possible boredom of exploring, a punk, so they won't worship me, and to be less afraid of hostile terrestrials, ..non-romantic, love is overrated, especially for me right now, I'm basically a god, with no need to reproduce, so love is unlikely."
(completed after 5 days, testing it in simulations as to not accidentally make a doll)
"Okay,... now to activate-"
(tries to unleash the personality matrix into the sanctuary, but it denied to action, saying that the matrix needs to begin in a physical body)
"goddammit, now I have to wait for a me to land,...I goanna sleep until that happens.."
(after waiting 5 more days, a me lands)
"YES, visual, initiate on the one that landed"
(after a second, an image is shown as it slows it's decent, and I see my first planet)
"it is a brave new world, and a fantastic planet.... okay... it just looks like something out of a space western, meaning, barren, dirty and hot...a perfect first planet to terraform...all this dirt and not just sand means nutrients and a good base for plants."
